Part - 7 : Relationships - BE PATIENT

[karams]

Hi! All
As of now, this is the last of the 7 part series!!! Let's have the Part 8 from someone else...

BE PATIENT

This is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital.
Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy,I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home & committed suicide.
Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.
People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

[deepshi]

patience is a real blessing:)
eludes d losers !!
Hi! All
As of now, this is the last of the 7 part series!!! Let's have the Part 8 from someone else...

BE PATIENT

This is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital.
Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy,I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home & committed suicide.
Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.
People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

[pragati]

Caring Attitude
Caring is very essential for any kind of relationship, whether it is a relation of you with your parents, with your brother or sister, with your friend or with your beloved one.
Every person needs care. How much one take care in a relation shows that how important is that relation in one’s life. Care does not need to any kind of show-off. How much our parents take care of us, we can feel it so there is no need to show –off that see how much I take care of you, one can feel it.

[radhikachhillar]

It is very true, liked it.

[pragati]

Thanks Radhika...


It is very true, liked it.

[karams]

Hey! Pragati,
Nice one...
Buddy you should have started a new thread...

[prashantacmet]

Barriers in interpersonal relationships

Check those barriers which are true for you in your relationship with your partner:

___ 1. Mistrust: lack of trust in your partner liking and accepting who you are rather than how she/he wants you to be. You are always on guard, vigilant, waiting to be taken advantage of in the relationship.

___ 2. Fear of rejection: belief that your partner couldn't possibly like or accept you for who you are and that she/he will probably reject you sooner or later, so you are on the lookout for the slightest signs of rejection.

___ 3. Need for approval: belief that you need ongoing approval from your partner. You remain cautious about the way you act, believe, feel, or behave so as not to offend or lose the approval of your partner.

___ 4. Insecurity: belief that you cannot rely on yourself or on your partner to take care of you. You are continually anxious about how your personal needs will be met.

___ 5. Inflexibility: belief that your way is the only or the best way for you and your partner to relate, act, interact, communicate, and problem solve. You hold to a rigid, structured, absolutist belief in the way things must be in your relationship.

___ 6. Lack of autonomy: belief that your partner must act, believe, think, feel, behave, and relate like you do, spending all free time with you. This does not allow the two of you to behave as independent, functioning human beings.

___ 7. Lack of communication: where active listening, effective, helpful responding, and open free problem solving is absent in your relatioinship. It is either closed (one way) or parallel (talking side by side with no listening) communication.

___ 8. Avoidance of conflict: belief that if you two never argue, fight, or disagree, the chance of having a lasting relationship is better.

___ 9. Lack of respect for the rights of the other: conscious or subconscious belief that your rights are the only ones that count in the relationship; therefore, acting in such a way that your partner's rights are ignored, negated, discounted, or offended.

___ 10. Fear of intimacy: belief that if your partner gets too close, somehow she/he will know about the real, feeling, sensitive, and human you. This knowledge will make you very vulnerable to being hurt, thus you shy away from getting too close.

___ 11. Need for power: belief that you must be the most powerful or exert the most strength of will in the relationship. You believe that otherwise you will be consumed, become a wimp (Casper Milquetoast), be ignored, be powerless, and therefore ineffectual in the relationship.

___ 12. Irresponsible: belief that you have little or no responsibility for the relationship or for your partner. You do nothing to nurture the relationship or to help your partner cope with life.

___ 13. Over-responsible: belief that you are solely responsible for the welfare and well being of both the relationship and your partner; therefore, you do things to improve the relationship and to cover for your partner's lack of responsibility.

___ 14. Low self-esteem: belief that you are worthless, of no value, with nothing to offer in a relationship. You either take no initiative in the relationship or you continually feel and act inferior, defensive, tentative, or resistant.

___ 15. Hiding feelings: belief that you should never let your partner know your feelings, especially if they are negative or self-deprecating. The result of not revealing your feelings, be they positive or negative, is that your partner is left in the dark and must always guess at what is really going on with you.

___ 16. Too independent: belief that you cannot afford to risk depending on anyone except yourself for fear of becoming vulnerable to being hurt, let down, rejected, or disappointed if your partner does not respond fully to any request for assistance, support, or help. Your behavior, therefore, keeps you and your partner separate and unconnected.

___ 17. Absence of fun: belief that having fun is frivolous and unnecessary in nurturing a relationship. Such a belief can lead to the partners' taking themselves and their relationship too seriously and becoming ``problem focused'' in their interactions.

[karams]

Hey! Prashant,
Gud stuff... and thanks for highlighting the other aspects....
Keep it up....