writetosandeep
August 20th, 2003, 03:02 AM
************** The Complete Sardarji Encyclopaedia ********
Sardarji is buying a TV. "Do you have color TVs?"
"Sure."
"Give me a green one, please."
**** * * * *
* * * * * * *************************************************
A sardar goes into a store and sees a shiny object. He asks the clerk,
"What is that shiny object?"
The clerk replies, "That is a thermos flask."
The sardar then asks, "What does it do?"
The clerk responds, "It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold."The sardar says, "I'll take it!"
The next day, he walks into work with his new thermos.
His sardar boss sees him and asks,"What is that shiny object with u?"
He said, "It's a thermos flask."
The boss then says,"What does it do?"
He replies, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
The boss said, "Wow, what do you have in it?"
The sardar replies, "Two cups of coffee and a coke."
* * * * * *
* * * * * *
How do you measure a Sardar's intelligence?
Stick a tire pressure gauge in his ear
* * * * * *
What do you do when a Sardar throws a hand grenade
at you?
************************************************** **
TO LOSE WEIGHT..
The doctor told Sardarji that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he would loose 34 kilos. At the end of 300 days, Sardarji called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem."What's the problem?"asked the doctor."I'm 2400 kms from home."
************************************************** **
A sardarji goes to the see Jurassic Park and when the Dinosaurs start approaching he is cowering in his seat when his
friend asks him "kyon sardarji, kya baat hai? Dar kyon lag raha hai cinema hi to hai"
Sardarji replies "Aadmi hoon aur akkal hai,pata hai ki cinema hai lekin voh to janwar hai, usko kya pata "
************************************************** **
Two dogs, Rubi and Moti, and a Sardarji were sent to the outer space.
The ground control issues commands
"Rubi!"
"Woof!"(its the barking sound ) "Press the red button."
"Woof! Woof!"
"Moti!"
"Woof!" "Press the white button." "Woof! Woof!"
"Sardarji!" "Woof." "Stop barking, feed the dogs and don't touch anything!"
************************************************** **
************************************************** ***************
************************************************** ***************
A Sardarji bought a new car. Next day he is driving his car to office.
On the way he was waiting for the Signal. Suddenly he opened the door and got down.
Then he went to the Traffic Police and asked him, 'How much should I pay to turn right?'
The Policeman was astonished and asked, 'Why are you asking like this?'
Then Sardarji showed him the sign board which was in the corner of the road: 'Free Left Turn'
************************************************** *********
Jugnu Singh sees lot of guys running on the highway.
Asks a bystander as to why are the guys doing what they are doing.
The bystander: A Marathon race is going on
Jugnu Singh: What do they get from that?
Bystander: The winner will get a prize.
Jugnu Singh: Then why are the others running?!
************************************************** *******************
Jugnu Singh: I was born in the Punjab.
Harpal Singh: Oh really, which part?
Jugnu Singh: All of me, silly.
************************************************** *******************
Sardarji is buying a TV. "Do you have color TVs?"
"Sure."
"Give me a green one, please."
**** * * * *
* * * * * * *************************************************
A sardar goes into a store and sees a shiny object. He asks the clerk,
"What is that shiny object?"
The clerk replies, "That is a thermos flask."
The sardar then asks, "What does it do?"
The clerk responds, "It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold."The sardar says, "I'll take it!"
The next day, he walks into work with his new thermos.
His sardar boss sees him and asks,"What is that shiny object with u?"
He said, "It's a thermos flask."
The boss then says,"What does it do?"
He replies, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
The boss said, "Wow, what do you have in it?"
The sardar replies, "Two cups of coffee and a coke."
* * * * * *
* * * * * *
How do you measure a Sardar's intelligence?
Stick a tire pressure gauge in his ear
* * * * * *
What do you do when a Sardar throws a hand grenade
at you?
************************************************** **
TO LOSE WEIGHT..
The doctor told Sardarji that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he would loose 34 kilos. At the end of 300 days, Sardarji called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem."What's the problem?"asked the doctor."I'm 2400 kms from home."
************************************************** **
A sardarji goes to the see Jurassic Park and when the Dinosaurs start approaching he is cowering in his seat when his
friend asks him "kyon sardarji, kya baat hai? Dar kyon lag raha hai cinema hi to hai"
Sardarji replies "Aadmi hoon aur akkal hai,pata hai ki cinema hai lekin voh to janwar hai, usko kya pata "
************************************************** **
Two dogs, Rubi and Moti, and a Sardarji were sent to the outer space.
The ground control issues commands
"Rubi!"
"Woof!"(its the barking sound ) "Press the red button."
"Woof! Woof!"
"Moti!"
"Woof!" "Press the white button." "Woof! Woof!"
"Sardarji!" "Woof." "Stop barking, feed the dogs and don't touch anything!"
************************************************** **
************************************************** ***************
************************************************** ***************
A Sardarji bought a new car. Next day he is driving his car to office.
On the way he was waiting for the Signal. Suddenly he opened the door and got down.
Then he went to the Traffic Police and asked him, 'How much should I pay to turn right?'
The Policeman was astonished and asked, 'Why are you asking like this?'
Then Sardarji showed him the sign board which was in the corner of the road: 'Free Left Turn'
************************************************** *********
Jugnu Singh sees lot of guys running on the highway.
Asks a bystander as to why are the guys doing what they are doing.
The bystander: A Marathon race is going on
Jugnu Singh: What do they get from that?
Bystander: The winner will get a prize.
Jugnu Singh: Then why are the others running?!
************************************************** *******************
Jugnu Singh: I was born in the Punjab.
Harpal Singh: Oh really, which part?
Jugnu Singh: All of me, silly.
************************************************** *******************