MATHEMATICS

[dotasara]

> ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
>
>
> Smart man + smart woman = romance
>
> Smart man + dumb woman = affair
>
> Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
>
> Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
>
>
>
> OFFICE ARITHMETIC
>
> Smart boss
> + smart employee = profit
>
> Smart boss + dumb employee = production
>
> Dumb boss +
> smart employee = promotion
>
> Dumb boss
> + dumb employee = overtime
>
>
>
> SHOPPING MATH
>
> A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
>
> A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
>
>
>
> GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
>
> A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
>
> A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
>
> A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can
spend.
>
> A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
>
>
> HAPPINESS
>
> To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love
him a
> little.
>
> To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try
to
> understand her at all.
>
> LONGEVITY
>
> Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are
a
lot
> more willing to die.
>
>
> PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
>
> A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
>
> A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she
does.
>
>
> DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
>
> A woman has the last word in any argument.
>
> Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new
argument.
>
>
> HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
>
> Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the
ribs
> and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I
started
> doing the same thing to them at funerals.