sabeena
November 21st, 2003, 03:24 PM
SADDAM Hussein was sitting peacefully in his office wondering who to invade next when his telephone rang.
"Hallo! Hussein paji," a heavily accented voice said. "This is Santa
Singh in Barnala, Punjab. I'm ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on all of you in Iraq."
"Well, Santa." Saddam replied, "This is indeed important news! Tell me
how big is your army?"
"At this moment..." said Santa after a moment's calculation, "there is main, mera cousin Surjit, mera next-door neighbour Gurdial
and the entire bhangra team from the village --that makes nine."
Saddam sighed. "I must tell you Santa, that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Changa!" said Santa."I'll be ringing you back."
Sure enough the next day Santa rang back. "Right Hussein bhai, the war
is still on! We have managed to acquire some equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be Santa?" Saddam asked. "Well we have
two combine harvesters, a bulldozer and Gurdial's tractor from the farm."
Once more Saddam sighed. "I must tell you Santa that I have 16 Thousand
tanks, 14 thousand armoured personnel carriers and my army has increased
to one and a half million since we last spoke."
"Is that really so?" said Santa. "I'll be ringing you back!"
Sure enough Santa rang again the next day. "Right Mr.Hussein the war is
still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've modified a
government cropduster with a couple o' rifles in the cockpit and the
village kho-kho team has joined us as well!"
Saddam was silent for a minute then sighed. "I must tell you Santa that I have 10 thousand bombers, 20 thousand MIG-19 attack planes, my military complex is surrounded by laser-guided surface-to-air missile sites and
since we last spoke my army has increased to two million."
"Koi gal nahin," said Santa. "I'll be having to be ringin' ya back."
Sure enough Santa called again the next day. "Right,Mr. Hussein, I am
very sorry to tell you we'll be calling off the war".
"I'm sorry to hear that Santaji. I was so looking forward to it," said
Saddam. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
Well to tell you the truth," began Santa "We've all had a little chat
and there's no way we can feed two million prisoners."
"Hallo! Hussein paji," a heavily accented voice said. "This is Santa
Singh in Barnala, Punjab. I'm ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on all of you in Iraq."
"Well, Santa." Saddam replied, "This is indeed important news! Tell me
how big is your army?"
"At this moment..." said Santa after a moment's calculation, "there is main, mera cousin Surjit, mera next-door neighbour Gurdial
and the entire bhangra team from the village --that makes nine."
Saddam sighed. "I must tell you Santa, that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Changa!" said Santa."I'll be ringing you back."
Sure enough the next day Santa rang back. "Right Hussein bhai, the war
is still on! We have managed to acquire some equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be Santa?" Saddam asked. "Well we have
two combine harvesters, a bulldozer and Gurdial's tractor from the farm."
Once more Saddam sighed. "I must tell you Santa that I have 16 Thousand
tanks, 14 thousand armoured personnel carriers and my army has increased
to one and a half million since we last spoke."
"Is that really so?" said Santa. "I'll be ringing you back!"
Sure enough Santa rang again the next day. "Right Mr.Hussein the war is
still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've modified a
government cropduster with a couple o' rifles in the cockpit and the
village kho-kho team has joined us as well!"
Saddam was silent for a minute then sighed. "I must tell you Santa that I have 10 thousand bombers, 20 thousand MIG-19 attack planes, my military complex is surrounded by laser-guided surface-to-air missile sites and
since we last spoke my army has increased to two million."
"Koi gal nahin," said Santa. "I'll be having to be ringin' ya back."
Sure enough Santa called again the next day. "Right,Mr. Hussein, I am
very sorry to tell you we'll be calling off the war".
"I'm sorry to hear that Santaji. I was so looking forward to it," said
Saddam. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
Well to tell you the truth," began Santa "We've all had a little chat
and there's no way we can feed two million prisoners."