sweet
May 5th, 2003, 12:39 AM
---First we thought the PC was a calculator. Then we found out how to turn numbers into letters with ASCII -- and we thought it was a typewriter. Then we discovered graphics, and we thought it was a television. With the World Wide Web, we've realized it's a brochure.
----Why did the Mafia kill Einstein? He knew too much.
----If riding in an airplane is flying, then riding in a boat is swimming. If you want to experience the element, get out of the vehicle.
----Ever notice that even the busiest people are never too busy to tell you just how busy they are?
----Some people develop eye strain looking for trouble.
----The only weapon that becomes sharper with constant use is the tongue.
----If you sing country music backwards, you get your job and your wife back.
----Someone who thinks of himself as a wit is usually half right.
---A baby is the most complicated object made by unskilled labor.
----Why not move the political conventions to one of the winter months so all that hot air won't go to waste?
----Before Xerox, five carbons were the maximum extension of anybody's ego.
----Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise person to be able to sell it.
.
----Don't worry over what other people are thinking about you. They're too busy worrying over what you are thinking about them.
----Four out of five people hate being surveyed.
----It is only possible to live happily-ever-after on a day-to-day basis.
-----Sometimes I need what only you can provide - Your absence.
----Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.
----I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
----Love does not die easily. It is a living thing. It thrives in the face of all of life's hazards, save one -- neglect.
-----Anything worth having is worth working for.
----The whole order of things is as outrageous as any miracle which could presume to violate it.
cheers...................................
----Why did the Mafia kill Einstein? He knew too much.
----If riding in an airplane is flying, then riding in a boat is swimming. If you want to experience the element, get out of the vehicle.
----Ever notice that even the busiest people are never too busy to tell you just how busy they are?
----Some people develop eye strain looking for trouble.
----The only weapon that becomes sharper with constant use is the tongue.
----If you sing country music backwards, you get your job and your wife back.
----Someone who thinks of himself as a wit is usually half right.
---A baby is the most complicated object made by unskilled labor.
----Why not move the political conventions to one of the winter months so all that hot air won't go to waste?
----Before Xerox, five carbons were the maximum extension of anybody's ego.
----Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise person to be able to sell it.
.
----Don't worry over what other people are thinking about you. They're too busy worrying over what you are thinking about them.
----Four out of five people hate being surveyed.
----It is only possible to live happily-ever-after on a day-to-day basis.
-----Sometimes I need what only you can provide - Your absence.
----Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.
----I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
----Love does not die easily. It is a living thing. It thrives in the face of all of life's hazards, save one -- neglect.
-----Anything worth having is worth working for.
----The whole order of things is as outrageous as any miracle which could presume to violate it.
cheers...................................