vimal_saroha
December 18th, 2003, 03:46 PM
OFCOURSE NOT GENERATED BY ME ,COPPIED FROM SOMEWHERE ,STILL I WOULD LIKE TO SHARE
> >** Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with* fire at one end & a * fool on the other.
> >** Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day* internationals are more popular than a five day test .
> >*** Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man* loses his bachelor degree* and*** woman gains her master.
> >**** Divorce : Future tense of marriage
> >**** College : A place where some pursue learning and* others learn pursuing.
> >**** Lecture : An art of transferring information* from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without
> >** passing through "the ! minds of* either".
> >**** Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied* by the number present
> >**** Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such* a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece .
> >**** Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine* will-power is
> > defeated* by * feminine water-power ...
> >**** Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before* marriage .
> >**** Conference Room : A place where everybody talks,* nobody listens & * everybody disagrees later on.
> >**** Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going* to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
> >**** Classic : A book which people praise, but do not* read.
> >**** Smile:- A curve that can set a lot of things* straight.
> >**** Office:- A place where you can relax after your* strenuous home life.
> >**** Yawn:- The only time some married men ever get* to open their mouth.
> >**** Etc.:- A sign to make others believe that you* know more than you actually do.
> >**** Committee:- Individuals who can do nothing* individually and sit to decide*** that nothing can be done together.
> >**** Experience:- The name men give to their* mistakes.
> >**** Atom Bomb:- An invention to end all inventions.
> >**** Philosopher:- A fool who torments himself during* life, to be spoken of when dead.
> >**** Diplomat:- A person who tells you to go to hell* in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
> >**** Opportunist:- A person who starts taking bath if* he accidentally falls Into a river.
> >**** Optimist :A person who while falling from Eifel* tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
> >**** Pessimist:- A person who says that O is the last* letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word
OPPORTUNITY .
> > Miser:-* A person who** lives poor so that he can die rich.
> >**** Father:- A banker provided by nature.
> >**** Criminal:- A guy no different from the rest...* except that he got* caught.
> >**** Boss:- Someone who is early when you are late * and late when you are* early.
> >**** Politician:- One who shakes your hand before elections and your* Confidence after.
> >**** Doctor :- A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his* bills.
> >**** S/W & N/W Engineer :- One who gets paid for reading such mails
> >
> >** Have a nice day.
> >** Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with* fire at one end & a * fool on the other.
> >** Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day* internationals are more popular than a five day test .
> >*** Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man* loses his bachelor degree* and*** woman gains her master.
> >**** Divorce : Future tense of marriage
> >**** College : A place where some pursue learning and* others learn pursuing.
> >**** Lecture : An art of transferring information* from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without
> >** passing through "the ! minds of* either".
> >**** Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied* by the number present
> >**** Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such* a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece .
> >**** Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine* will-power is
> > defeated* by * feminine water-power ...
> >**** Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before* marriage .
> >**** Conference Room : A place where everybody talks,* nobody listens & * everybody disagrees later on.
> >**** Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going* to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
> >**** Classic : A book which people praise, but do not* read.
> >**** Smile:- A curve that can set a lot of things* straight.
> >**** Office:- A place where you can relax after your* strenuous home life.
> >**** Yawn:- The only time some married men ever get* to open their mouth.
> >**** Etc.:- A sign to make others believe that you* know more than you actually do.
> >**** Committee:- Individuals who can do nothing* individually and sit to decide*** that nothing can be done together.
> >**** Experience:- The name men give to their* mistakes.
> >**** Atom Bomb:- An invention to end all inventions.
> >**** Philosopher:- A fool who torments himself during* life, to be spoken of when dead.
> >**** Diplomat:- A person who tells you to go to hell* in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
> >**** Opportunist:- A person who starts taking bath if* he accidentally falls Into a river.
> >**** Optimist :A person who while falling from Eifel* tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
> >**** Pessimist:- A person who says that O is the last* letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word
OPPORTUNITY .
> > Miser:-* A person who** lives poor so that he can die rich.
> >**** Father:- A banker provided by nature.
> >**** Criminal:- A guy no different from the rest...* except that he got* caught.
> >**** Boss:- Someone who is early when you are late * and late when you are* early.
> >**** Politician:- One who shakes your hand before elections and your* Confidence after.
> >**** Doctor :- A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his* bills.
> >**** S/W & N/W Engineer :- One who gets paid for reading such mails
> >
> >** Have a nice day.