me_rathee
March 30th, 2005, 12:45 PM
SABSE PEHLE TO MEIN SARDARO SE SORRY BOLNA CHAHUNGA........KYOKII YEH JOKE UNHI KE HAI..........PLZ ALL SARDARS BURA MAT MAAN NA
A mad dog is chasing a sardar. The sardar laughs while
running. Know why?
He says - mera to Airtel hai phir bhi Hutch ka
network follow kar raha hai.
-----------------------
A for apple. B for bada apple. C for chota apple. D
for dusra apple. E for ek aur apple. F for fokat ka
apple. G for gol apple. H for ho gaya na
pet kharab khake itne apple.
------------------------------
Sardar Apni Wife Ke Sath Coffee Shop Gaya, hot Coffee
order Ki, Coffee Atte Hi wife Se Bola - Jaldi Jaldi
pee. Wife Boli - Kyu?
Sardar Bola - Hot coffe Rs. 5 and Cold Coffee Rs.10.00
-------------------------------------------------------
Sardarji went to party and introduced his family to
his friends.
I am Sardar and this is sardarney, this is my kid and
this is my kidney.
-------------------------------------------------------
Sardar to Salesman: I Need Pink curtains for my
computer.
Salesman: Sardarji Computer Doesnt Need Curtains.
Sardarji: Oye! I have windows installed.
-------------------------------------------------------
What is the similarity between Mobile & Marriage?
Thode Din Aur Ruk Jata To Thoda Achha Model Mil
Jaata!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Sardar1:- Marte Waqt Aadmi Ko Kya Dena Chahiye?
Sardar2:-Birla cement
Sardar1:-Kyun?
Sardar2:- Kyunki Is Cement Mein Jaan Hain
----------------------------------------------
A Sardar had called an Englishman for lunch. There was
curd on the table. The guest asked what is this?
The Sardar didn't know English, he said "Milk sleeping
in night,morning becomes tight"
--------------------------------------
Once a sardarji tries to cheat the Indian railways.
He is thinking for a novel idea. He thinks a
lot and finally he did one thing,
he bought the ticket and didn't travel.
------------------------------------------------
A sardar was drawing money from ATM. The sardar behind
him in the line said, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen ur
password. Its 4 asterisks(****).
The first sardar replies, " Ha! Ha! Haaa! U r wrong.
Its 1258."
--------------------------------------
What is the height of stupidity?
2 sardarjies sitting on a motorcycle & fighting for a
window seat
-------------------------------------------
Did you hear about the sardarji who is so rich he has
two swimming pools,
one of which is always empty?
It's for people who can't swim!
------------------------------------
Santa Singh: Will this bus take me to Jalandhar?
Driver: Which part?
Santa Singh: All of me, of course!
---------------------------------------
What do you call a Sardarji in a deep well?
A deep thinker..
-----------------------------------------
Sardarji calls Air India. 'How long does it take to
fly to Amritsar?'
'Just a sec,' says the customer service assistant.
'Thank you.' says the Sardarji and hangs up.
----------------------------------------------
Santa Singh goes to a TV shop and asks, 'Aap ke paas
color TV hai kya?'
'Haan' replies shopowner.
Santa Singh says, 'Ek hara vala dena!'
-----------------------------------------
Once Santa Singh was riding a cycle and he suddenly
hit a girl!
So girl shouted, 'Sala ghanti nahi maar sakta tha!!!'
And sardarji replied, 'Poori cycle to maar di ab
ghanti alag se maroon??!!!'
------------------------------------------
Banta Singh happened to be in a queue at a railway
station ticket counter with two men ahead of him.
'Ek Punjab Mail dena.' demanded the man in front. He
was given a ticket.
'Ek Punjab Mail dena.' the second man asked and was
handed a ticket.
Then came the turn of Banta Singh, 'Ek Punjab female
dena!'
'What do u mean by Punjab female?' asked the clerk.
'It is for my wife' replied Banta Singh.
----------------------------------------------
Help....
The Titanic is going to be drowned....
Everybody in the ship is shouting, crying, running or
praying to God...
Just then a Italian asks the nearby Sardarji in the
ship.
Italian : How far is land, from here ?
Sardarji : Two miles .
Italian : Only two miles, Then why are these fools
making noise. I have got the experience of swimming
even more. The Italian jumps off the ship into the sea
and comes up to the layer to ask something again.
Italian : Just tell me which side, is land two miles
from here ?
Sardarji : Downwards......
---------------------------------------------
Aaj Tak gets news that 100 sardars are killed in a
train accident at Amritsar station. Only one sardar
left alive.
The correspondent goes to him and asks, "Sardarji how
did it happen?"
Sardar: "Oh ji pucho mat. sab kuch sahi tha sab log
platform par khade gaadi ki wait kar rahe they.
Achanak announcement hui ki shatabdee express 2 no.
platform par aa rahi hai. Jaise hi sab ne suna ki
gaddi PLATFORM PAR aa rahi hai, sab log apni jaan
bachane ke liye patri par kood gaye. Aur tabhi gaddi
patri par aa gayi."
Aaj tak: "Thank god. Aap ne samajhdari dikhayee. Aap
patri par nahin koode."
Sardar: "oe nahin ji main to suicide karne ke liye
patri par hi leta tha.Jaise hi announcement hui main
to platform par chad gaya."
------------------------------------------
...Banta Singh and Santa Singh got tired using cell
phones and for a change decided to use really ancient
methods of communication. They decided to use pigeons
to send messages. So they went and bought expensive
carrier pigeons from the Jama Masjid market in old
Delhi and found to their joy that the pigeons indeed
>could be trained and the birds very easily learnt to
>return directly to their respective homes. And so this
scheme worked very fine.
One day Santa sends his pigeon. When the pigeon
reaches to Banta it is with out message. Banta picked
his mobile and asked Santa "What is this joke? The
pigeon is without any message!!!"
Santa said "Oye khotey, this was a missed call."
================================================== =====================
Banta Singh happened to be in a queue at a railway station ticket counter
with two men ahead of him.
Ek Punjab Mail dena.' demanded the man in front. He was given a
ticket.
'Ek Punjab Mail dena.' the second man asked and was handed a ticket.
Then came the turn of Banta Singh, 'Ek Punjab female dena!' 'What do u mean
by Punjab female?' asked the clerk.
'It is for my wife' replied Banta Singh.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Sardar had called an Englishman for lunch. There was curd on the table.
The guest asked what is this?
The Sardar didn't know English, he said "Milk sleeping in night, morning
becomes tight"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sardar enters kitchen and opens the sugar box. Sees inside and closes it.
Wife observes the whole episode
Again he comes and does the same stuff.
Wife asks : Why are you doing this?
Sardar replies: Doc told to check sugar level regularly
Once a sardar calls another sardar on the phone and says "Hi, Main Bol Raha
Hoon". The other sardar replies "Kamaal Hain, Ithe Vi Main Bol Raha Hoon!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Man: How was your exam today ?
Sardar: Fine, except for one question which was difficult
Man: Which one ?
Sardar: What is the past tense of THINK ?
I thought...i thought ...i thought about it and wrote THUNK
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
koi apni biwi ka ! antim sanskar karke ghar ja raha tha ki achanak
bijli chamki, badal garje, jor se baarish shuru hui dukhi
aadmi bola: Lagta hai pohanch gayee
A mad dog is chasing a sardar. The sardar laughs while
running. Know why?
He says - mera to Airtel hai phir bhi Hutch ka
network follow kar raha hai.
-----------------------
A for apple. B for bada apple. C for chota apple. D
for dusra apple. E for ek aur apple. F for fokat ka
apple. G for gol apple. H for ho gaya na
pet kharab khake itne apple.
------------------------------
Sardar Apni Wife Ke Sath Coffee Shop Gaya, hot Coffee
order Ki, Coffee Atte Hi wife Se Bola - Jaldi Jaldi
pee. Wife Boli - Kyu?
Sardar Bola - Hot coffe Rs. 5 and Cold Coffee Rs.10.00
-------------------------------------------------------
Sardarji went to party and introduced his family to
his friends.
I am Sardar and this is sardarney, this is my kid and
this is my kidney.
-------------------------------------------------------
Sardar to Salesman: I Need Pink curtains for my
computer.
Salesman: Sardarji Computer Doesnt Need Curtains.
Sardarji: Oye! I have windows installed.
-------------------------------------------------------
What is the similarity between Mobile & Marriage?
Thode Din Aur Ruk Jata To Thoda Achha Model Mil
Jaata!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Sardar1:- Marte Waqt Aadmi Ko Kya Dena Chahiye?
Sardar2:-Birla cement
Sardar1:-Kyun?
Sardar2:- Kyunki Is Cement Mein Jaan Hain
----------------------------------------------
A Sardar had called an Englishman for lunch. There was
curd on the table. The guest asked what is this?
The Sardar didn't know English, he said "Milk sleeping
in night,morning becomes tight"
--------------------------------------
Once a sardarji tries to cheat the Indian railways.
He is thinking for a novel idea. He thinks a
lot and finally he did one thing,
he bought the ticket and didn't travel.
------------------------------------------------
A sardar was drawing money from ATM. The sardar behind
him in the line said, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen ur
password. Its 4 asterisks(****).
The first sardar replies, " Ha! Ha! Haaa! U r wrong.
Its 1258."
--------------------------------------
What is the height of stupidity?
2 sardarjies sitting on a motorcycle & fighting for a
window seat
-------------------------------------------
Did you hear about the sardarji who is so rich he has
two swimming pools,
one of which is always empty?
It's for people who can't swim!
------------------------------------
Santa Singh: Will this bus take me to Jalandhar?
Driver: Which part?
Santa Singh: All of me, of course!
---------------------------------------
What do you call a Sardarji in a deep well?
A deep thinker..
-----------------------------------------
Sardarji calls Air India. 'How long does it take to
fly to Amritsar?'
'Just a sec,' says the customer service assistant.
'Thank you.' says the Sardarji and hangs up.
----------------------------------------------
Santa Singh goes to a TV shop and asks, 'Aap ke paas
color TV hai kya?'
'Haan' replies shopowner.
Santa Singh says, 'Ek hara vala dena!'
-----------------------------------------
Once Santa Singh was riding a cycle and he suddenly
hit a girl!
So girl shouted, 'Sala ghanti nahi maar sakta tha!!!'
And sardarji replied, 'Poori cycle to maar di ab
ghanti alag se maroon??!!!'
------------------------------------------
Banta Singh happened to be in a queue at a railway
station ticket counter with two men ahead of him.
'Ek Punjab Mail dena.' demanded the man in front. He
was given a ticket.
'Ek Punjab Mail dena.' the second man asked and was
handed a ticket.
Then came the turn of Banta Singh, 'Ek Punjab female
dena!'
'What do u mean by Punjab female?' asked the clerk.
'It is for my wife' replied Banta Singh.
----------------------------------------------
Help....
The Titanic is going to be drowned....
Everybody in the ship is shouting, crying, running or
praying to God...
Just then a Italian asks the nearby Sardarji in the
ship.
Italian : How far is land, from here ?
Sardarji : Two miles .
Italian : Only two miles, Then why are these fools
making noise. I have got the experience of swimming
even more. The Italian jumps off the ship into the sea
and comes up to the layer to ask something again.
Italian : Just tell me which side, is land two miles
from here ?
Sardarji : Downwards......
---------------------------------------------
Aaj Tak gets news that 100 sardars are killed in a
train accident at Amritsar station. Only one sardar
left alive.
The correspondent goes to him and asks, "Sardarji how
did it happen?"
Sardar: "Oh ji pucho mat. sab kuch sahi tha sab log
platform par khade gaadi ki wait kar rahe they.
Achanak announcement hui ki shatabdee express 2 no.
platform par aa rahi hai. Jaise hi sab ne suna ki
gaddi PLATFORM PAR aa rahi hai, sab log apni jaan
bachane ke liye patri par kood gaye. Aur tabhi gaddi
patri par aa gayi."
Aaj tak: "Thank god. Aap ne samajhdari dikhayee. Aap
patri par nahin koode."
Sardar: "oe nahin ji main to suicide karne ke liye
patri par hi leta tha.Jaise hi announcement hui main
to platform par chad gaya."
------------------------------------------
...Banta Singh and Santa Singh got tired using cell
phones and for a change decided to use really ancient
methods of communication. They decided to use pigeons
to send messages. So they went and bought expensive
carrier pigeons from the Jama Masjid market in old
Delhi and found to their joy that the pigeons indeed
>could be trained and the birds very easily learnt to
>return directly to their respective homes. And so this
scheme worked very fine.
One day Santa sends his pigeon. When the pigeon
reaches to Banta it is with out message. Banta picked
his mobile and asked Santa "What is this joke? The
pigeon is without any message!!!"
Santa said "Oye khotey, this was a missed call."
================================================== =====================
Banta Singh happened to be in a queue at a railway station ticket counter
with two men ahead of him.
Ek Punjab Mail dena.' demanded the man in front. He was given a
ticket.
'Ek Punjab Mail dena.' the second man asked and was handed a ticket.
Then came the turn of Banta Singh, 'Ek Punjab female dena!' 'What do u mean
by Punjab female?' asked the clerk.
'It is for my wife' replied Banta Singh.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Sardar had called an Englishman for lunch. There was curd on the table.
The guest asked what is this?
The Sardar didn't know English, he said "Milk sleeping in night, morning
becomes tight"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sardar enters kitchen and opens the sugar box. Sees inside and closes it.
Wife observes the whole episode
Again he comes and does the same stuff.
Wife asks : Why are you doing this?
Sardar replies: Doc told to check sugar level regularly
Once a sardar calls another sardar on the phone and says "Hi, Main Bol Raha
Hoon". The other sardar replies "Kamaal Hain, Ithe Vi Main Bol Raha Hoon!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Man: How was your exam today ?
Sardar: Fine, except for one question which was difficult
Man: Which one ?
Sardar: What is the past tense of THINK ?
I thought...i thought ...i thought about it and wrote THUNK
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
koi apni biwi ka ! antim sanskar karke ghar ja raha tha ki achanak
bijli chamki, badal garje, jor se baarish shuru hui dukhi
aadmi bola: Lagta hai pohanch gayee