What would you choose...

[parity]

Self Respect Or Relation ??
Also why ?
I dont think i need to give any explanation regarding the topic:)

[choudharyneelam]

Before getting into any relation i'll first think for Self-Respect but if i'm already in any relation then i won't make any issue on this self-respect as sometimes such thing makes us feel very low but with the changing circumstances we get it back..also when in relationship with someone then there are lots of sacrifces and compromises we've to make..and ya it's tough to face such situation but can never dream of making the relationship weak.

But will surely give a proper thought about self-respect if i'm not into any relationship or when going to start a new relationship.

Baaki mujhe life aur relationships ke baare mein bahaut kuch seekhna hai :)

[devdahiya]

Self Respect Or Relation ??
Also why ?
I dont think i need to give any explanation regarding the topic:)


Sukarama bebey, very nice thread indeed.I will choose my self respect any day.If self respect is not there then what kinda relations are you talking bout.A chappy without self respect is like a boat without a sailor.A person without self respect is an agony on this earth, a burdon even God does not want to lift from here.What good a man can be for any relation without self respect..?

[stokas]

Self Respect Or Relation ??
Also why ?
I dont think i need to give any explanation regarding the topic:)


It's surely self-respect! Relation is the second part!!

Why?? It's a tough question dear:)

Will try to answer it next time!!!!!;)

[rajeshrathee]

Its really a good thread and tough one too.

Now it is tough because of complex human nature.

Self respect obviously come at first place but at the same time human beings are a social animal and they can not live without relations.

Sukarma, I think you have to decide about what type of relation you are considering here.

Is it relation within your family(i.e husband,wife,kids,parents) or within relations between two lover or relationhip within your friends circle or within the society ?.

Here it is also very important as to decide or know the other person's nature or his emotional state of mind at the point of judgement, like no one would mind if a street dog bark at him/her.

It is also depending upon as how you percieve a particular event.

On the other hand if you are within a family then I think relations come first but upto a point where water is not going above your head.

Similarly in society self respect is the priority but with friends its a complex situation again as your close friends will have more liberty then a new friend.

So to sum up self respect and relations both are important depending upon various factors and circumstances.

[parity]

I agree Neelam there is no limit of learning but whatever u know n the clarity of thoughts u have is really good :)
U r right we should priortise but dont u think if something going out of control then we shud think thoda sa strongly ! Obviously we are nothing without our people.
But i think, if we cant respect ourself then we cant respect any one.
As i understood u said we shud priortise (degree of relation ) Really, a god approach :)
If i m right( i read it in ur thread) u r starting a new life. Good luck dear n i am sure ur partner would be the luky one :D
Thanx for replying :)

[parity]

Sukarama bebey, very nice thread indeed.I will choose my self respect any day.If self respect is not there then what kinda relations are you talking bout.A chappy without self respect is like a boat without a sailor.A person without self respect is an agony on this earth, a burdon even God does not want to lift from here.What good a man can be for any relation without self respect..?

Kaka Ji Its not only a thread, its a try to understand life better :)
Just want to know how experinced n mature people like u, Rajesh Sir n Shailender Ji take life. Also at the same time the way young people define relations :)
Kaka Ji, very bold n practical choice :cool: But difficult hota hai na aisa desicion lena ?!

Thank u for replying n guiding :)

[parity]

It's surely self-respect! Relation is the second part!!

Why?? It's a tough question dear:)

Will try to answer it next time!!!!!;)

Please Sir answer zaroor karna :) as it is important for me to properly understand your choice n for my future refrences :D

[parity]

Its really a good thread and tough one too.
Here it is also very important to decide or know the other person's nature or his emotional state of mind at the point of judgement, like no one would mind if a street dog bark at him/her.
It is also depending upon as how you percieve a particular event.

Sir very good point. Hats off to u :D
Obviously, it is possible that other person didnt intend to do so or he doesnt understand the impact of his words n actions.
Thank u Sir :)
Hope to get this kind of guidance from u in future also :)

[naveenbazad]

very nice to see this thread ......i am very new to jatland discussions....i have very very different opinion regarding self respect and relations.....it depends totally on what relation is between two person .....if husband and wife and wife is far away from husband and husband works and sleep only and wife asks not to phone her even then if husband phones his wife then i think here husband has not lost his self respect even if he doesnt obey her it might be case he doesnt want to talk to any other person as i think she might be most important in his life .............case of him vs boss or him vs stature in society :i think here self respect comes first because he compromises on his self respect there then for a short time he will gain but at the end no one will pay or respect who doesnt have self respect

[swati]

Self Respect Or Relation ??
Also why ?
I dont think i need to give any explanation regarding the topic:)

self respect definitely

if u don't hav self respect u are nothing :)

[choudharyneelam]

I agree Neelam there is no limit of learning but whatever u know n the clarity of thoughts u have is really good :)
U r right we should priortise but dont u think if something going out of control then we shud think thoda sa strongly ! Obviously we are nothing without our people.
But i think, if we cant respect ourself then we cant respect any one.
As i understood u said we shud priortise (degree of relation ) Really, a god approach :)
If i m right( i read it in ur thread) u r starting a new life. Good luck dear n i am sure ur partner would be the luky one :D
Thanx for replying :)


Thanks dear for liking my approach somewhere and even you are also right with your point...definitely we need to give some strong thought if it is going out of control and should be handled properly. But there is one more thing that first we should try to give the best we have and then surely we will recieve back something good in return...and ya i said all according to the degree of relation....that is also an impt. part...and i think where relations are good then we never lose our self-respect and even never let the other one to lose it in any case...so it's all upto our understanding.

One more thing....right now it is not finalised and when it will be finalised i'll surely like to share with you all...aur baaki wo lucky hoga ya nahin ye to wahi batayega... :D

[neels]

[quote=parity;124499]Self Respect Or Relation ??


Self Respect is very important, but then... so are relations :)

Hey sukarma... very tough to say which one is more important? If one has to maintain relations, have to compromise with ones self respect at some points in life. we all may declare very boldly, we value self respect more, but all let it go for maintaining harmony in relations., giving it name of adjustments. And then why not, well adjusted personality is the well integreted one. Isnt it, too much of Self Respect is always blamed and mistaken as Ego, and people who care for their self respect too much are blamed as egoists.
Dont worry dear, n dont set any rules for your life, just be honest to yourself and to your relations also, rest life ll tell you yourself which one to value more at a given point.
Like all, me too agree that it depends about which relation we are talking about, in some relations,we certainly wont let our esteem go down, but some relations are too sensitive to fan self-esteem.

[ritu]

very rt neelam.actually u have given the most reasonable and practical explaination.very good thinking.every line u wrote is so true.i agree with u.most of the people nowdays take ego as selfrespect too sometimes.keep writing.
[quote=parity;124499]Self Respect Or Relation ??


Self Respect is very important, but then... so are relations :)

Hey sukarma... very tough to say which one is more important? If one has to maintain relations, have to compromise with ones self respect at some points in life. we all may declare very boldly, we value self respect more, but all let it go for maintaining harmony in relations., giving it name of adjustments. And then why not, well adjusted personality is the well integreted one. Isnt it, too much of Self Respect is always blamed and mistaken as Ego, and people who care for their self respect too much are blamed as egoists.
Dont worry dear, n dont set any rules for your life, just be honest to yourself and to your relations also, rest life ll tell you yourself which one to value more at a given point.
Like all, me too agree that it depends about which relation we are talking about, in some relations,we certainly wont let our esteem go down, but some relations are too sensitive to fan self-esteem.

[parity]

So here we got 2 terms by two very noble females :)
1) Self respect as Ego by Neelam Ji
2) Ego as Self respect by Ritu Ji
Unexpected achievement :)

Thank u everybody for replying n appreciating my this try. I think conclusion of all the responses is

1) Be flexible, decide acc to the situation
2) Shud priortise
3) Shud mantain balance between Emotions n Practicality
4) Shud set limits
5) Try to know the intentions of other person

If i forgot something or if something wrong then ur replies are honourably desired :)

[skarmveer]

In my openion if we have choice then self-respect is first if we dont have choice then relation will be first. This is the matter of choice.

We dint have choice if we are talking about the relations like-Father, mother,
brother, sisters even our teachers(Guru) and oviously these type of relation
which depends on our birth.

We can change or before making the relation whether our respect is their or not-like making a freind, going to marry, Joining a Job etc..

Regards

So here we got 2 terms by two very noble females :)
1) Self respect as Ego by Neelam Ji
2) Ego as Self respect by Ritu Ji
Unexpected achievement :)

Thank u everybody for replying n appreciating my this try. I think conclusion of all the responses is

1) Be flexible, decide acc to the situation
2) Shud priortise
3) Shud mantain balance between Emotions n Practicality
4) Shud set limits
5) Try to know the intentions of other person

If i forgot something or if something wrong then ur replies are honourably desired :)

[ritu]

sukrama u r sounding little bit sarcastic here.i did not give any term to any thing.i was only agreeing with what neelam ji said .by the way i did not write quote on ur comment .ur thread itself wassenseless.can anybody on this earth live without relations or selfrespect.if u have started a thread selfrespect vs money .it would have made more sense.agar rishte soch samjh ke banaye jaye to na aap aise logo se rishta hi kayam nahi karenge jo aap ki selfrespect ko hurt kar jaye.rahi baat bloodrelations ki mummy papa bhai bahan husband kids vo agr galti se aapki selfrespect ko hurt kar jayenge to kya aap onhe chod denge .nahi kabhi nahi.atleast me to nahi .for me my relations r definaley more important to me than anything else in the world.aap aise hi kise se relate nahi ho jaate ho.agar soch samjh ke rishte banavoge to selfrespect hurt nahi hogi .aur relation har kisi rah chalte se to banya nahi jata .rishte aapki apni personality ka bhi pratibimb hote h .
So here we got 2 terms by two very noble females :)
1) Self respect as Ego by Neelam Ji
2) Ego as Self respect by Ritu Ji
Unexpected achievement :)

Thank u everybody for replying n appreciating my this try. I think conclusion of all the responses is

1) Be flexible, decide acc to the situation
2) Shud priortise
3) Shud mantain balance between Emotions n Practicality
4) Shud set limits
5) Try to know the intentions of other person

If i forgot something or if something wrong then ur replies are honourably desired :)

[parity]

-> sukrama u r sounding little bit sarcastic here.i did not give any term to any thing.
-> ur thread itself was senseless.
-> if u have started a thread selfrespect vs money .it would have made more sense.
Ritu Ji, please first u calm down, dnt get sooo angry.
I am sorry if u found anything offending in my last post :(
I only tried to appreciate u two (Neelam Ji n u) I also tried to use apt words i still cant understand where i went wrong.
I was to happy that we got two more new things through this thread. Which are very important to be cleared for living a gud life ; self respect n ego. Thats it. So appreciated u n Neelam Ji for bringing these in front of us. I dont think i used dual meaning words, pata nahi kahan confusion ho gayi aapko...

Thank u Ritu Ji, that u found this thread "senseless" n still posted ur views. Yehi hota hai baddapan (no sarcasm)

If mujhe sarcastic hi hona hota, to main apni ye confusion (weakness) publically accept na karti. I need the guidance of senior Jatlanders n views of the present generation :)

I didnt posted this thread mere for discussing, i had confusion so wanted to clear thats it. Money never confuses me so i dont need any clarity there, so i posted this one.
I need ur guidance (If aap badi hain to) or i need ur suggestions ( if aap choti hain)

Anyways thanx a lot for guiding me n posting ur views (no sarcasm) :)
I am genuinely sorry that u felt bad :(
Ur further responses are honourably desired, sach always. Hope this time i am clear.......

[ritu]

sukrama i wrote whatever i felt.now if ur sayiing that it was not ur intention then i believe u.
see relations have never confused me and relations r the most important part of my life.so for me nothing can be vs relations. by gods grace my relations have never hurt my selfrepect or viceversa

[neels]

sukrama i wrote whatever i felt.now if ur sayiing that it was not ur intention then i believe u.
see relations have never confused me and relations r the most important part of my life.so for me nothing can be vs relations. by gods grace my relations have never hurt my selfrepect or viceversa


You are very lucky Ritu, May God always shower His blessings on you. And pls always remember to Thank God for this ultimate blessing. :)

[choudharyneelam]

Neelam Ma'm aapke aane ke baad main kaafi confuse ho rahi hun aur peechhe jaake dekhti hun ki maine aisi impressive baat kya kah di ki mera naam liya gaya....tab pata chalta hai ki this is Neelam Ma'm not me(neelam choudhary)

any solution for it ?;) :D