virender
July 31st, 2003, 10:20 AM
> > > > TEACHER: Why are you late?
> > > > WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
> > > > TEACHER: What sign?
> > > > WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: John, how do you spell "crocodile"?
> > > > JOHN: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
> > > > TEACHER: No, that's wrong
> > > > JOHN: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
> > > > SARAH: "HIJKLMNO"!!
> > > > TEACHER: What are you talking about?
> > > > SARAH: Yesterday you said it's H to O!
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
> > > > GEORGE: Here it is!
> > > > TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
> > > > CLASS: George!
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: Willy, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't
> > > > have ten years ago.
> > > > WILLY: Me!
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
> > > > TOMMY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground then you are.
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark?
> > > > FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?
> > > > SILVIA: Your name on this report card.
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I".
> > > > ELLEN: I is...
> > > > TEACHER: No, Ellen. Always say, "I am."
> > > > ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > Teacher: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
> > > > Johnny: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the sameday
> > > > sametime."
> > > >
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > Teacher: "George Washington not only chopped down his father's
Cherry
> > > > tree, but also admitted doing it.Now do you know why his father
didn't
> > > > punish him?"
> > > > Johnny: "Because George still had the axe in his hand."
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before
eating?
> > > > Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when
people
> > > > are no longer interested?
> > > > Pupil: A teacher.
> > > > WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
> > > > TEACHER: What sign?
> > > > WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: John, how do you spell "crocodile"?
> > > > JOHN: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
> > > > TEACHER: No, that's wrong
> > > > JOHN: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
> > > > SARAH: "HIJKLMNO"!!
> > > > TEACHER: What are you talking about?
> > > > SARAH: Yesterday you said it's H to O!
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
> > > > GEORGE: Here it is!
> > > > TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
> > > > CLASS: George!
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: Willy, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't
> > > > have ten years ago.
> > > > WILLY: Me!
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
> > > > TOMMY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground then you are.
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark?
> > > > FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?
> > > > SILVIA: Your name on this report card.
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I".
> > > > ELLEN: I is...
> > > > TEACHER: No, Ellen. Always say, "I am."
> > > > ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > Teacher: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
> > > > Johnny: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the sameday
> > > > sametime."
> > > >
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > Teacher: "George Washington not only chopped down his father's
Cherry
> > > > tree, but also admitted doing it.Now do you know why his father
didn't
> > > > punish him?"
> > > > Johnny: "Because George still had the axe in his hand."
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before
eating?
> > > > Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
> > > > *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
> > > > Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when
people
> > > > are no longer interested?
> > > > Pupil: A teacher.