prayas
January 6th, 2005, 11:32 AM
HOW WILL I KNOW IF I MET THE PERSON I SHOULD MARRY??
The choice of a marriage partner should not be based on "I get a
warm, wonderful feeling whenever we're together and I want to have that
warm wonderful feeling forever, so let's go get married".
Feelings need to be acknowledged, of course, but they need considerable assistance from your brain.
Marriage means choosing the person you will spend the rest of you
life with.This, as you may have guessed, is a very long time to spend
with one person.
This person will live with you, eat meals with you, sleep with you,
and go on vacation with you. More important yet, this person will share
your children. You need to choose wisely. The decision should not be made based on Feelings alone. You need to ask yourself some tough questions.! The
decisions have to be made on solid considerations.
Will this person be a good partner? Is she mature enough to put her
Own selfish desires aside to look out for what is best for the family?
Is he prepared to be a good provider? What is his track record?
Is he responsible enough to get a good job and keep it?
Will this person be a good parent? Can you stand the thought of
Your children turning out exactly like this person? They will, you know.
Children spend a lot of time with their parents and consequently
pick up many or most of their parents' character traits. You had better
like your spouse's traits a lot because you will be seeing them again in your
children.
If something were to happen to you, would you completely trust this
person, alone, with the task of raising and forming your children?
The answers to those questions go a long way toward forming the kind of
Adults they will become. Who will be answering those questions for your
children?
Does this person you are marrying have sexual self-control?
Single people sometimes have this idea that marriage is just some
kind of lifelong sex festival and that as long as they have each other,
they will never be tempted by other people.
Wrong!
There are many times in every marriage when one partner or the
other is sexually unavailable?
At times like this, other people can seem very appealing. That can
Be dangerous, because there are plenty of very attractive people out
there who are willing to make them available to married men and women.
What kind of marriage can you have with someone you couldn't trust
on a business trip?
These are very important questions, and if you are not comfortable
with all of the answers, you should definitely not marry this person. None
if this is to say that feelings play no role at all in a marriage decision.
You don't have to, "Well, I suppose that you would make a good spouse and
parent, so even though I don't particularly like you I guess I'll marry you'.
You need to be happy and excited about the prospect of spending your life
With someone. Your brain however must acknowledge that this person as a
Good catch.
Don't listen to your heart alone or your head alone. Wait until
your heart and head agree.
"Love is not about finding the right person, but creating a right
relationship.
It's not about how much love you have in the beginning but how much
love you build till the end."
The choice of a marriage partner should not be based on "I get a
warm, wonderful feeling whenever we're together and I want to have that
warm wonderful feeling forever, so let's go get married".
Feelings need to be acknowledged, of course, but they need considerable assistance from your brain.
Marriage means choosing the person you will spend the rest of you
life with.This, as you may have guessed, is a very long time to spend
with one person.
This person will live with you, eat meals with you, sleep with you,
and go on vacation with you. More important yet, this person will share
your children. You need to choose wisely. The decision should not be made based on Feelings alone. You need to ask yourself some tough questions.! The
decisions have to be made on solid considerations.
Will this person be a good partner? Is she mature enough to put her
Own selfish desires aside to look out for what is best for the family?
Is he prepared to be a good provider? What is his track record?
Is he responsible enough to get a good job and keep it?
Will this person be a good parent? Can you stand the thought of
Your children turning out exactly like this person? They will, you know.
Children spend a lot of time with their parents and consequently
pick up many or most of their parents' character traits. You had better
like your spouse's traits a lot because you will be seeing them again in your
children.
If something were to happen to you, would you completely trust this
person, alone, with the task of raising and forming your children?
The answers to those questions go a long way toward forming the kind of
Adults they will become. Who will be answering those questions for your
children?
Does this person you are marrying have sexual self-control?
Single people sometimes have this idea that marriage is just some
kind of lifelong sex festival and that as long as they have each other,
they will never be tempted by other people.
Wrong!
There are many times in every marriage when one partner or the
other is sexually unavailable?
At times like this, other people can seem very appealing. That can
Be dangerous, because there are plenty of very attractive people out
there who are willing to make them available to married men and women.
What kind of marriage can you have with someone you couldn't trust
on a business trip?
These are very important questions, and if you are not comfortable
with all of the answers, you should definitely not marry this person. None
if this is to say that feelings play no role at all in a marriage decision.
You don't have to, "Well, I suppose that you would make a good spouse and
parent, so even though I don't particularly like you I guess I'll marry you'.
You need to be happy and excited about the prospect of spending your life
With someone. Your brain however must acknowledge that this person as a
Good catch.
Don't listen to your heart alone or your head alone. Wait until
your heart and head agree.
"Love is not about finding the right person, but creating a right
relationship.
It's not about how much love you have in the beginning but how much
love you build till the end."