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Thread: This is the time to come to the USA

  1. #1

    This is the time to come to the USA

    I have been deluged by a lot of debate over illegal immigration in the US. Infact I have set my alarm clock to the "Laura Ingram" radio show. I really need some nasty news to wake me up. Otherwise I need 12 alarms all over the house that go off in a seqauence at an interval of 5 minutes each. So by the time i am done putting off all my alarms, I am up.

    Anyways, the update is that the Senate has come up with a compromise bill that would allow illegal immigrants in the US to get permanent residency which would be followed by citizenship.

    So if you are one of those "despos" who want to come to America come rain or shine, get a plane ticket to Mexico. the take a rickety bus ride to one of the border towns like Nuvo Laredo or Tijuana and jump the fence into the US that very night. But make sure that you do it as soon as possible. Becuase you have to be in the US illegally before the bill is signed by the president. \

    Ofcourse, I am just being ironic. The US government is making me and other jat bhais in the US feel like jokers who have been waiting for 13 years or even longer to secure a green card. Honestly, I have just lost the motivation, and am not very interested in living in this country any more. The taxes are killing. Inflation is skyrocketing. Jobs are scarce. Most if not all government social welfare programs like medicare and socil security are on the brink of disaster. And to add insult to injury, some stupid Americans mistake me for an Arab and make me feel miserable. Let me add to it that most people have been really nice so far, but then there are always some "bad apples," no matter where you go.

  2. #2
    Quote Originally Posted by dahiyarules
    I have been deluged by a lot of debate over illegal immigration in the US. Infact I have set my alarm clock to the "Laura Ingram" radio show. I really need some nasty news to wake me up. Otherwise I need 12 alarms all over the house that go off in a seqauence at an interval of 5 minutes each. So by the time i am done putting off all my alarms, I am up.

    Anyways, the update is that the Senate has come up with a compromise bill that would allow illegal immigrants in the US to get permanent residency which would be followed by citizenship.

    So if you are one of those "despos" who want to come to America come rain or shine, get a plane ticket to Mexico. the take a rickety bus ride to one of the border towns like Nuvo Laredo or Tijuana and jump the fence into the US that very night. But make sure that you do it as soon as possible. Becuase you have to be in the US illegally before the bill is signed by the president. \

    Ofcourse, I am just being ironic. The US government is making me and other jat bhais in the US feel like jokers who have been waiting for 13 years or even longer to secure a green card. Honestly, I have just lost the motivation, and am not very interested in living in this country any more. The taxes are killing. Inflation is skyrocketing. Jobs are scarce. Most if not all government social welfare programs like medicare and socil security are on the brink of disaster. And to add insult to injury, some stupid Americans mistake me for an Arab and make me feel miserable. Let me add to it that most people have been really nice so far, but then there are always some "bad apples," no matter where you go.
    hahahhaaa.. Unique Sumit and unique are his ideas... In my view the best thing is to have some base in USA and India both. Spending few months every year in USA is not a bad thing as one comes across many new biz idea. I have spoken to many people and almost everyone tells me that USA is not good for kids and old people. I seem to agree to that view point. USA will always remain in top league as far as I can see. However, one has to tailor a solution of his own to live respectfully and happily. I will never live permanently anywhere outside India. I had the opportunity of settling in UK or moving over to USA even 30 years back. However, life never attracted me and moved back to India. Once again I am going back, ofcourse with frequent trips to USA and some other countries.

    PS: what is this picture is all about Sumit?
    RK^2

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by dahiyarules
    I have been deluged by a lot of debate over illegal immigration in the US.

    So if you are one of those "despos" who want to come to America come rain or shine, get a plane ticket to Mexico. the take a rickety bus ride to one of the border towns like Nuvo Laredo or Tijuana and jump the fence into the US that very night. But make sure that you do it as soon as possible. Becuase you have to be in the US illegally before the bill is signed by the president.

    Honestly, I have just lost the motivation, and am not very interested in living in this country any more. The taxes are killing. Inflation is skyrocketing. Jobs are scarce. Most if not all government social welfare programs like medicare and socil security are on the brink of disaster. And to add insult to injury, some stupid Americans mistake me for an Arab and make me feel miserable. Let me add to it that most people have been really nice so far, but then there are always some "bad apples," no matter where you go.
    Arey Sumit Bhai, kyoon apne bhaiyon ko marwa rahe ho, Mexico border ki advise de-kar. I have served both in US and Mexico. Mexican police catches batches of illigal Indian immigrants and puts them in detention centres. While in Mexico City, I had once gained a day's consular access to one of the detention centres and had sought interviews with many of them. One guy from Gujarat said: "I have lost everything - my father, mother and everyone else died in Bhuj earthquake." I asked him "what is the co-relationship of Bhuj earthquake and your coming to this distant land?" The guy even did not want to tell his correct address in India, leave aside the travel documents etc.

    And getting Mexican visa is not easy. If you are having a Green Card (and Indian passport), Sumit, just try a Mexican visa. I bet - you will not get it easily. If at all you get, it would be after a prolonged process of about 3 month's waiting time and enquiry procedure.

    For everyone's information, I am attaching below an interesting article which appeared yesterday, regarding the situation on Mexican border.

    The higher the wall, the less it works
    Douglas S. Massey The New York Times
    WEDNESDAY, APRIL 5, 2006

    PRINCETON, New Jersey The Mexican-American border is not now and never has been out of control. The rate of undocumented migration to the United States, adjusted for population growth, has not increased in 20 years. That is, from 1980 to 2004 the annual likelihood that a Mexican will make his first illegal trip to the United States has remained at about 1 in 100.

    What has changed are the locations and visibility of border crossings. That shift, more than anything, has given the public undue fears about waves of Mexican workers trying to flood into America.

    Until the 1990s, most undocumented Mexicans entered through either El Paso, Texas, or San Diego, California. Both cities have large Hispanic populations, so the daily passage of even thousands of Mexicans was not very visible or disruptive.

    This changed in 1992 when the Border Patrol built a steel fence south of San Diego from the Pacific Ocean to the port of entry at San Ysidro, California, where a highway crosses into Mexico.

    The fence blocked one of the busiest illicit crossing routes and channeled migrants toward the San Ysidro entry station, where their numbers rapidly built up to impossible levels.

    Every day the same episode unfolded: the crowd swelled to a critical threshold, whereupon many migrants made what the local press called "banzai runs" into the United States, darting through traffic on the Interstate and clambering over cars.

    Waiting nearby were Border Patrol officers - there not to arrest the migrants but to capture the mayhem on video. Although nothing had changed except the site of border crossings, the video gave the impression that the border was overwhelmed by a rising tide of undocumented migrants.

    In the ensuing public uproar, the policy of tougher border enforcement was expanded to all of the San Diego and El Paso area in 1993 and 1994. So migrants began going to more remote locations along the border in Arizona.

    In 1989, two thirds of undocumented migrants came in through El Paso or San Diego; by 2004 two-thirds crossed somewhere else. (My statistics come from a study I have been undertaking with financing from the National Institutes of Health since 1982.)

    Unlike the old crossing sites, these new locations were sparsely settled, so the sudden appearance of thousands of Mexicans understandably generated much local agitation. By redirecting flows into harsh, remote terrain the United States also tripled the death rate during border crossing.

    Less well known is that American policies also reduced the rate of apprehension, because those remote sectors of the border had fewer Border Patrol officers. During the 1980s, the probability that an undocumented migrant would be apprehended while crossing stood at around 33 percent; by 2000 it was at 10 percent, despite increases in spending on border enforcement.

    Naturally, public perceptions of chaos on the border prompted more calls for enforcement. The number of Border Patrol officers increased from around 2,500 in the early 1980s to around 12,000 today, and the agency's annual budget rose to $1.6 billion from $200 million. The boundary between Mexico and the United States has become perhaps the most militarized frontier between two nations at peace anywhere in the world.

    Although border militarization has had little effect on the probability of Mexicans migrating illegally, it did reduce the likelihood that they would return to their homeland. America's tougher line roughly tripled the average cost of getting across the border illegally. Thus Mexicans who had run the gantlet at the border were more likely to hunker down and stay in America.

    My study has shown that in the early 1980s, about half of all undocumented Mexicans returned home within 12 months of entry. By 2000 the rate of return migration stood at just 25 percent.

    America is now locked into a perverse cycle whereby additional border enforcement further decreases the rate of return migration, which accelerates undocumented population growth, which brings calls for harsher enforcement. The only thing to show for two decades of border militarization is a larger undocumented population than we would otherwise have, a rising number of Mexicans dying while trying to cross and a growing burden on taxpayers for enforcement that is counterproductive.

    America needs an immigration policy that seeks to manage the cross- border flows of people that are inevitable in a global economy, not to repress them through unilateral police actions.

    Douglas S. Massey, a professor of sociology at Princeton's Woodrow Wilson School of Public and International Affairs, is the author of "Beyond Smoke and Mirrors: Mexican Immigration in an Age of Economic Integration."
    तमसो मा ज्योतिर्गमय

  4. #4
    Hey Rakesh Sir!

    The picture has a funny story behind it. I pretended to lay inconscious on a busy highway where I knew I and my friends were being followed by another group of frineds in a different car. We came up with this crazy idea. we hid our car in the bushes and I lay on the highway waiting for the second car. when they came near me, they couldnt believe what they saw. So one of my friends. got out to see whats wrong with me. when I didnt move he started yelling: Sumits dead!!!...and others were like what the f**k? And all this time while my friends were going through this trauma, my other friends were taking pictures and making a video. I never palyed a prank like this before. So its one of my favorite pictures.

    Talking about the main issue here, Deswal sir is right. The Mexican government is wicked and smart. it is wicked becuase it has monopolized its border with the US. It encourages illegal immigration into the US openly and without any fear or hesitation. Infact theres a government sponsored program to help mexicans with maps and guides to sneak into the US. On the other hand, the Mexican govenrment strongly discourages immigration from other countries via Mexico. It has fenced up it's southern border with Honduras and detains others.

    I have heard another conspiracy theory. The elite in Mexico are all white. Mexico is a very beautiful and resource-rich country. The elite who also formm the government in Mexico want the "aboriginal trash' out of mexico. And not to my amusement, they have been doing it pretty efficiently. They has managed to squeeze in millions upon millions into the US and believe it or not Canada too. This leaves the minority elites with more land and resources to themselves.

    Finally coming back to Rakesh Sir's point. yes. It is not a very good idea to raise your children in the US. they put a lot of "diversity, equality, and poilitical correctness" bullsh*t in childrens minds. School education is nowhere in comparison to what we have in India. On the top of it all, children are exposed to crazy entertainment on TV and internet. I really do not know what the kids here are upto. I am shocked that these people will be voting and running this country someday. When I am at the gym, I intentionally take a treadmill in the back and look at other's treadmill tv-screens. Everyone is watching some crappy MTV-BET-VH1 programming. Its a sad story.

    I was in India last year. Even though things have changed, but raising children is becoming a challenege there too. Its really difficult to sheild your children from corruption and immorality in India too. The best option is to send children to a good boarding school with a strict warden and never spare the rod. Just the way we were raised right to our generation. I lost my father when I was only one year old. But that did not stop my mother from doubling up the role when it came to cracking the whip. I really appreciate it all becuase it has helped me become who I am today.

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by dahiyarules
    Hey Rakesh Sir!

    .
    who is this Rakesh? Definitely not me....LOL

    RK^2

  6. #6
    Damn! :D

    All the time I thought I was saying RK sir....i am loosing my mind. heheheh. So who wants to give my exams. :D

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by dahiyarules
    And to add insult to injury, some stupid Americans mistake me for an Arab and make me feel miserable.
    Ha ha haaaa Bhai yoh to kasoota rassa sai.

    Sumit, Jat ki moochh zarrori sain.

    BTW why the Americans are worried has a lighter side to it. Read on .....

    Indian boy Chandru on his first day at school in USA..........

    It was the first day of school and a new student named Chandrashekhar Subrahmanyam entered the fourth grade.

    The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History."

    Who said "Give me Liberty, or give me Death"?

    She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrashekhar, who had his hand up:

    "Patrick Henry, 1775" he said."

    "Very good !"

    Who said " Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?"

    Again, no response except from Chandrashekhar.

    "Abraham Lincoln, 1863" said Chandrashekhar.

    The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed.
    Chandrashekhar, who is new to our country, knows more! about its history than you do."

    She heard a loud whisper: "F**k the Indians,"

    "Who said that?" she demanded.
    Chandrashekhar put his hand up. "General Custer, 1862."

    At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."

    The teacher glares around and asks "All right! Now, who said that?"

    Again, Chandrashekhar says, "George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."

    Now furious, another student yells, "Oh yeah? S*ck this!"

    Chandrashekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, "Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"

    Now with almost a mob hysteria someone said "You little ****. If you say anything else, I'll kill you."

    Chandrashekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, "Gary Condit to Chandra Levy, 2001."

    The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, "Oh ****, we're f**ked!"

    And Chandrashekhar said quietly, "George Bush, Iraq, Dec 2005."
    - In the ordinary course of nature thousands upon thousands are born every day, but he alone is truly born whose birth leads to the elevation of his race.

  8. #8

    Cool

    >>>hahahahhaha despite the fact that Sumit has already banged the scene by such a post.....:rolleyes: since many days and then his PHOTO session....simply ingenious & innovational



    >>>SAMPURAN SIR......you are simply amazing.....read the text thrice and every time rolled over my desk.....neighbours yelling :eek: what the hell is he up to now....... but you have presented the american history to its core....hahahah
    simlpy exhilarating, bizarre, engrossing, enthralling, enticing, entrancing, stimulating, provocative........"bas bhujjo matna.....ji likadd gya hai":p :p :p :p :p .....thats what you call.......eat the $**T.....any way americans deserve this and this the time..........
    Keshav Dahiya
    www.dahiya.us



  9. #9

    ram ram

    its great to see intellect on jatland,i completely agree to sumit bhai.Though its been just 4 months in USA i feel the same about this sh**t hole.I have seen our people who sacrificed the blooming years of their life for a better tomorrow and today is a nigtmare.they struggled with their past and struggling even harder with their present.
    one thing is for sure i m not raising my kids here because once they get sensible here i will be a big fool.And to all my jat bhais in india forget that you can ever drain money out of this ..........these whites have no culture,no history of their own but they know how to rule.they are sucking the best brains from the world to become all mighty.......so thier strategy is to use our brains against us,americas big bully image is not hidden from anybody.
    so bhai lets get what we are here for and get back to the basics.

    lets rape this mother f**ker and get back to our roots.
    i apologize for such language but this is american venom and u hav no escape

    ram ram
    I CAN,I SHOULD,I WILL

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by sampuran
    Ha ha haaaa Bhai yoh to kasoota rassa sai.

    Sumit, Jat ki moochh zarrori sain.

    BTW why the Americans are worried has a lighter side to it. Read on .....

    Indian boy Chandru on his first day at school in USA..........

    It was the first day of school and a new student named Chandrashekhar Subrahmanyam entered the fourth grade.

    The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History."

    Who said "Give me Liberty, or give me Death"?

    She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrashekhar, who had his hand up:

    "Patrick Henry, 1775" he said."

    "Very good !"

    Who said " Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?"

    Again, no response except from Chandrashekhar.

    "Abraham Lincoln, 1863" said Chandrashekhar.

    The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed.
    Chandrashekhar, who is new to our country, knows more! about its history than you do."

    She heard a loud whisper: "F**k the Indians,"

    "Who said that?" she demanded.
    Chandrashekhar put his hand up. "General Custer, 1862."

    At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."

    The teacher glares around and asks "All right! Now, who said that?"

    Again, Chandrashekhar says, "George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."

    Now furious, another student yells, "Oh yeah? S*ck this!"

    Chandrashekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, "Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"

    Now with almost a mob hysteria someone said "You little ****. If you say anything else, I'll kill you."

    Chandrashekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, "Gary Condit to Chandra Levy, 2001."

    The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, "Oh ****, we're f**ked!"

    And Chandrashekhar said quietly, "George Bush, Iraq, Dec 2005."
    Very funny

  11. #11
    Refreshing post Sumit bhai... chalne do asse hi... I agree with you regarding raising kids here... But there are exceptions to the rule, I have seen good Indian-American kids here, having fairly good (its unreasonable to expect much) understanding of culture and roots even though majority falls on other side of line... All the mambo-jambo about culture and morals is pratially true though... agreed! but there are people who manage it well... am not defending US system, in fact, I am thinking of going back after some years... but there are some advantages here apart from $ factor...(e.g. its easier to get student in good grad school here than student from India... life is moderately cool for average student in US, but in India average students (e.g. those who do BA etc) don't get much out of it)...
    those who complain can always find enuf to complain about, be it US or India... Indians also ***** about Indian system back in India and US seems refuge for them... those who stay here develop contrary attitude and find India better... Utimately it boils down to individual's capacity to handle and depends what you want to gain... yeah, things are changing for good these days...

    -vinod

    Quote Originally Posted by dahiyarules
    I have been deluged by a lot of debate over illegal immigration in the US. Infact I have set my alarm clock to the "Laura Ingram" radio show. I really need some nasty news to wake me up. Otherwise I need 12 alarms all over the house that go off in a seqauence at an interval of 5 minutes each. So by the time i am done putting off all my alarms, I am up.

    Anyways, the update is that the Senate has come up with a compromise bill that would allow illegal immigrants in the US to get permanent residency which would be followed by citizenship.

    So if you are one of those "despos" who want to come to America come rain or shine, get a plane ticket to Mexico. the take a rickety bus ride to one of the border towns like Nuvo Laredo or Tijuana and jump the fence into the US that very night. But make sure that you do it as soon as possible. Becuase you have to be in the US illegally before the bill is signed by the president. \

    Ofcourse, I am just being ironic. The US government is making me and other jat bhais in the US feel like jokers who have been waiting for 13 years or even longer to secure a green card. Honestly, I have just lost the motivation, and am not very interested in living in this country any more. The taxes are killing. Inflation is skyrocketing. Jobs are scarce. Most if not all government social welfare programs like medicare and socil security are on the brink of disaster. And to add insult to injury, some stupid Americans mistake me for an Arab and make me feel miserable. Let me add to it that most people have been really nice so far, but then there are always some "bad apples," no matter where you go.
    Last edited by vinodks; April 7th, 2006 at 08:10 AM.
    It may be that universal history is the history of the different intonations given to a handful of metaphors. -J L Borges

  12. #12
    I don't completely agree with this... kind of negative way to look at things...

    -vinod

    Quote Originally Posted by varunmandhan
    its great to see intellect on jatland,i completely agree to sumit bhai.Though its been just 4 months in USA i feel the same about this sh**t hole.I have seen our people who sacrificed the blooming years of their life for a better tomorrow and today is a nigtmare.they struggled with their past and struggling even harder with their present.
    one thing is for sure i m not raising my kids here because once they get sensible here i will be a big fool.And to all my jat bhais in india forget that you can ever drain money out of this ..........these whites have no culture,no history of their own but they know how to rule.they are sucking the best brains from the world to become all mighty.......so thier strategy is to use our brains against us,americas big bully image is not hidden from anybody.
    so bhai lets get what we are here for and get back to the basics.

    lets rape this mother f**ker and get back to our roots.
    i apologize for such language but this is american venom and u hav no escape

    ram ram
    It may be that universal history is the history of the different intonations given to a handful of metaphors. -J L Borges

  13. #13

    Good start!

    A very interesting thread indeed Sumit, ...
    I would definitely like to add some of my experiences too but at a later times....For now, I just wanted to stop by and make sure I complimented you on a good discussion!!!

    You among others had been missing in action here and so it's good to see some seasoned campaigners back on Jatland...

    Now, very quickly another very-very intriguing aspect about this whole topic of coming to the USA is also that for example if and when you go back to India on a vacation and talk about the same kinda frank stuff with your friends let's say, expanding on how while the money is good in America....but the place sucks and you guys are better off doing what you are doing, and staying where you are so much more content....THEY THINK WHAT A HYPOCRITE! Have you guys (who reside here in the USA and other abroad places) got those feelers too?!!....

    It is the most ridiculous thing to think of, but then when you think rationally and put yourself in their shoes; you do feel that no one likes to be told that their vision and dreams are really a hoax and that it is not really that paradise on earth that you always wanted to think it was! Everyone who has had nurtured even the smallest of dreams of making it abroad feels that look at these guys wo are already there, coming here and telling us not to watse our energies.....they do not want anyone else to get a piece of the pie!...

    This may be almost tangential to what you guys were talking about here....but just wanted to throw that into the pot to see what you guys think of it,....will be back with more thoughts later!...
    ...Wouldn't follow the trodden path, but shall leave a blazing trail!!!...

  14. #14

    Thumbs up

    Bhai
    I havent been to the US, but i have many people, many relatives, and my GF thr
    And still, all these people's praise cant still got me convinced about staying there, I believe it is really stupid to go to US now when US Economy has reached its threshold, and what is expected in future after Iraq and Afghanistan , world knows it.

    Secondly, India is a booming economy, according to a American economic institute, Indian Economy will overtake the American Economy by the year 2045, and seeing the projected GDP growth and positive work and directions taken by the govt. this is not an Impossible task.

    So Guys, it is time to contribute to growing Indian Economy, and beat the US Way behind.
    सच्चे शब्दों में सच के अहसास लिखेंगे ...
    वक्त पढे जिसको कुछ इतना खास लिखेंगे...
    गीत गजल हम पर लिखेंगे लिखने वाले...
    हमने कलम उठाइ, तो इतिहास लिखेंगे...!!

  15. #15

    Angry

    http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1344943/posts

    Please go through the user comments. pasting a few

    To: miliantnutcase
    Hah, sux for them. We keep luring their best and brightest away. America will do lesser and lesser to get more kids to take up science and technology, since it will have a good supply of scientists from other countries. If you ask me, it is not a good trend.


    To: miliantnutcase
    "Hah, sux for them. We keep luring their best and brightest away."

    Dont worry we have a never-ending supply of geniuses in India. You can have all you want and still we will never run short of them.
    सच्चे शब्दों में सच के अहसास लिखेंगे ...
    वक्त पढे जिसको कुछ इतना खास लिखेंगे...
    गीत गजल हम पर लिखेंगे लिखने वाले...
    हमने कलम उठाइ, तो इतिहास लिखेंगे...!!

  16. #16

    v interesting thread

    this is very interesting thread first of all

    in my view every location ,country has its own pros nd cons
    usa is using foreign brain because it can, it is the big bully coz it can
    thats the way it is..if there is sumthin u can gain from it gud for you
    even our country follows the same policy ..wat about the various mnc sftware openin in india..all courtesy usa ( due to cheap labour of course)
    a person need to b global in outlook .. yes usa has its own prob related to youth..but is our own country fulproof..wat about the shithole system rezervation( can a usa denizen expect it)
    atleast u r provided with afair chance acc to ur skills in usa.
    probs are everywhere so try to learn to live with them(wen they just dont get resolved)
    were ever u r gotta find positive bout that

  17. #17

    To be or not to be...

    Yeah...
    That is true; Every place has their goods and bads! It is what you imbibe and what you reject as you move along!

    There has to be a reason why some of us chose to be here and move ourselves and our families (in some cases) apparently because there was something this foreign country was to offer!...and the fact that we are still sticking here, means there is something that still appeals to us (forget all those stories about,'Oh, I am so used to the AC now and the dust in India is too much...etc etc. these stories are only Urban Legends and other than some rare idiots I have yet to meet a Desi who does not love being nostalgic about the Homeland and/or running there the first vacation or break they get!)...

    Now things have started to look up in India too, and precisely the things that the lack of which made some of us relocate ourselves are now available back home....or at least the Country is on the path wherein it would be comparitive to the standards!
    But then where do you go with the Political ambiguity that seems to always be omnipresent there in India?....and everything else and evils that easily can be related to it!

    Same here, how to you cope with the cultural clash and your kids growing up in an entirely different surroundings!?!...But there lies the beauty of a Desi resilience, I have seen families cope with it quite nicely and manage to bring up their kids with the utmost respectability and Indian values...in fact, in some cases it is disappointing to see even families in the big bad cities of India losing their moral values faster than here abroad!....so there is no good or bad!...You have to make the conditions happen as you want them to be!

    It is no use being in one place and missing the other....no use cribbing about what you don't have (being in either place)! Because like the saying goes,'Each of your feet in two different boats is nothing but short of disaster!'....
    ...Wouldn't follow the trodden path, but shall leave a blazing trail!!!...

  18. #18
    Very honestly, I want to share the happiest day of my life with ya'll. It was the day I came to America. I was very excited. I landed at Dulles international airport. Coincidentally, there was a Chikara boy from Jyonti in Dilli suba, in my flight. We btoh checked out our luggage together. My brother had come from New York to pick me up. The Airport parking lot put the Delhi Auto Expo to shame. That was the day many years ago that my life started in the US. By the second day reality set in. I woke up in a room that was way different from the room I had woken up in, all my life. I felt like a little puppy that had lost it way. My eyes swll up even today as I remember it. I was in my teens. When other children were having the joy of living with their family, here I was away from my mother for the first time in my life. Unprotected and uncared for. I did not know what was going to happen next, forget about having an idea what was going to happen in a few years. My future was very uncertain. Within a few days I left my brother too. I went to Florida for college. Life was unbearable. For more than an year, even the sound of a peacock, as I spoke to my Nana-Nani in their village made me very emotional. When it is winter time, I can still smell and feel the lush green mustard fields. Things like the prime time soap opera jingles from Star Plus that put me on odds with my mother left me in memory holes. Whether you guys accept it or not, leaving home and family is a price that canot be quantified, yet we still pay for it. So whats the charm?

    I never saw the tonies of money that people always talk about. I am supportng myelf, working my you know what off. At the end of the day my bank balance is near to zero. I may have some nice things in life. But, not to my surprise, all my friends in India have those things too. A nice car, a house, a credit card, cell phone gadgets etc. But they have a family, that I don't. My mother does not like it here. I am even willing to return and live with her. But I am about the take a very big step in my life. Very soon I will be starting my PHD program. This means I will be doing research for the rest of my life. I really do not know if the kind of infrastructure and funding that I expect waits for me in India. On the top of it all, the academic field is highly regulated by the government in India. The kind of free thought that persists and not just exists in the academia in America is unthinkable in India. Just like most Indian immigrants I am stuck at the point in my life where I have to choose between family and a career.

    On a lighter side, my mother says that she will live with me. But I know that she will never live in America. Her last visit was not exactly a pleasant experience. If I move back, and get some job in India, I really do not want to regret my decision some day.

    Americans are very nice people with a great history. This is the most accepting and inviting nation in the world. every year, more people immigrate to America alone than to the rest of the world put together. Here, people evaluate you on the basis of your achievements and not your connections or other things. But the culture is gettnig corrupted slowly with time. Blame political correctness. First they said homosexuality is Ok, so now they have it all over the place. when it goes to MTV, kids find it OK. Sex and relationships were said to be OK. Then it went all over the media. Now kids see it on TV and think its OK. The kind of America people have in mind, the immoral and culturally corrputed America that we think of did not exist not very long ago. Even now when I talk to older people I can see the sea-difference. But they let it all happen in the name of political correctness. Because it was politically incorrect to denounce hmosexuality, bad behavior, promiscuity, hip-hop-rap and other Black entertainment, no one stopped the armageddon from coming. If some day America will face disaster, it won't be because of terrorism, economy or politics. It will be becuase of decay of culture. A society without a culture is like a zombie without a brain. It is as good as dead.

    Raising kids in America is a challenge. Home school them. Send them to a boarding school in India later on. If you have to spank them, take them to mexico and do it in a 15 dollar motel room in Tijuana, and then drive back. But do it. Do not spare the rod. Do not expose them to any of the television programming options available. Let them read. Oh my god! It all sounds so unreal. See! thats my point. It has become unreal to raise your kids properly in the country. India is going the same way. Unfortunately, a relative of mine is going against her parents choice by marrying her boyfriend. No I am not ashamed to speak about her. Why should I be ashamed, when she is not ashamed to do what she is doing? What happened to the days when things used to be done the way tey were done for hundreds of years. I guess not very long ago. Infact it worked the same way for my own parents. So what has happened that everything has changed in just one generation? If I look around myself, I see that the only other influential factor that has changed in one generation is the media. Now you can disagree with me all you want. But the media has unscrupulously gained control over the people who had the responsibility to carry the torch of morality and understanding to the future generation. Everything that is not "Ok" is portrayed as "ok" by the media? My question is why? Well media is an expanding industry. I can agree against and in favor of the media. I support it because we are not supposed to take everything on the face value, that the media says. The hero eloping with the heroine happens only in movies. In reality "tau ka doga" should be concidered part of the equation. hehehe:D Ok! I am drifting from the main point. But you got my point. Right?

    So basically, summing up I would say that things are the same pretty much here or at back home. We would face the same hurdles at both places. But since we are emotionally connected to some things back home, we really have a hard time adusting to this place. This really is not that bad of a place, but neither is India. We are not far from the day when there will be a more unified world, with freedom of movement. It really won't make a difference then, which part of the world we live in.

  19. #19
    Quote Originally Posted by dahiyarules
    Very honestly, I want to share the happiest day of my life with ya'll. It was the day I came to America. I was very excited. I landed at Dulles international airport. Coincidentally, there was a Chikara boy from Jyonti in Dilli suba, in my flight. We btoh checked out our luggage together. My brother had come from New York to pick me up. The Airport parking lot put the Delhi Auto Expo to shame. That was the day many years ago that my life started in the US. By the second day reality set in. I woke up in a room that was way different from the room I had woken up in, all my life. I felt like a little puppy that had lost it way. My eyes swll up even today as I remember it. I was in my teens. When other children were having the joy of living with their family, here I was away from my mother for the first time in my life. Unprotected and uncared for. I did not know what was going to happen next, forget about having an idea what was going to happen in a few years. My future was very uncertain. Within a few days I left my brother too. I went to Florida for college. Life was unbearable. For more than an year, even the sound of a peacock, as I spoke to my Nana-Nani in their village made me very emotional. When it is winter time, I can still smell and feel the lush green mustard fields. Things like the prime time soap opera jingles from Star Plus that put me on odds with my mother left me in memory holes. Whether you guys accept it or not, leaving home and family is a price that canot be quantified, yet we still pay for it. So whats the charm?

    I never saw the tonies of money that people always talk about. I am supportng myelf, working my you know what off. At the end of the day my bank balance is near to zero. I may have some nice things in life. But, not to my surprise, all my friends in India have those things too. A nice car, a house, a credit card, cell phone gadgets etc. But they have a family, that I don't. My mother does not like it here. I am even willing to return and live with her. But I am about the take a very big step in my life. Very soon I will be starting my PHD program. This means I will be doing research for the rest of my life. I really do not know if the kind of infrastructure and funding that I expect waits for me in India. On the top of it all, the academic field is highly regulated by the government in India. The kind of free thought that persists and not just exists in the academia in America is unthinkable in India. Just like most Indian immigrants I am stuck at the point in my life where I have to choose between family and a career.

    On a lighter side, my mother says that she will live with me. But I know that she will never live in America. Her last visit was not exactly a pleasant experience. If I move back, and get some job in India, I really do not want to regret my decision some day.

    Americans are very nice people with a great history. This is the most accepting and inviting nation in the world. every year, more people immigrate to America alone than to the rest of the world put together. Here, people evaluate you on the basis of your achievements and not your connections or other things. But the culture is gettnig corrupted slowly with time. Blame political correctness. First they said homosexuality is Ok, so now they have it all over the place. when it goes to MTV, kids find it OK. Sex and relationships were said to be OK. Then it went all over the media. Now kids see it on TV and think its OK. The kind of America people have in mind, the immoral and culturally corrputed America that we think of did not exist not very long ago. Even now when I talk to older people I can see the sea-difference. But they let it all happen in the name of political correctness. Because it was politically incorrect to denounce hmosexuality, bad behavior, promiscuity, hip-hop-rap and other Black entertainment, no one stopped the armageddon from coming. If some day America will face disaster, it won't be because of terrorism, economy or politics. It will be becuase of decay of culture. A society without a culture is like a zombie without a brain. It is as good as dead.

    Raising kids in America is a challenge. Home school them. Send them to a boarding school in India later on. If you have to spank them, take them to mexico and do it in a 15 dollar motel room in Tijuana, and then drive back. But do it. Do not spare the rod. Do not expose them to any of the television programming options available. Let them read. Oh my god! It all sounds so unreal. See! thats my point. It has become unreal to raise your kids properly in the country. India is going the same way. Unfortunately, a relative of mine is going against her parents choice by marrying her boyfriend. No I am not ashamed to speak about her. Why should I be ashamed, when she is not ashamed to do what she is doing? What happened to the days when things used to be done the way tey were done for hundreds of years. I guess not very long ago. Infact it worked the same way for my own parents. So what has happened that everything has changed in just one generation? If I look around myself, I see that the only other influential factor that has changed in one generation is the media. Now you can disagree with me all you want. But the media has unscrupulously gained control over the people who had the responsibility to carry the torch of morality and understanding to the future generation. Everything that is not "Ok" is portrayed as "ok" by the media? My question is why? Well media is an expanding industry. I can agree against and in favor of the media. I support it because we are not supposed to take everything on the face value, that the media says. The hero eloping with the heroine happens only in movies. In reality "tau ka doga" should be concidered part of the equation. hehehe:D Ok! I am drifting from the main point. But you got my point. Right?

    So basically, summing up I would say that things are the same pretty much here or at back home. We would face the same hurdles at both places. But since we are emotionally connected to some things back home, we really have a hard time adusting to this place. This really is not that bad of a place, but neither is India. We are not far from the day when there will be a more unified world, with freedom of movement. It really won't make a difference then, which part of the world we live in.
    very true and very well written brother. I can't agrre more with u on this.
    Jat Balwan.....Jai Bhagwan

  20. #20

    Some points to ponder

    Sumit Bhai
    Good thread. Many people have talked about the ills of American society and the problems faced in raising children over there. Considering American history and their culture today, nothing much has changed. Early Americans wer e the criminal castawaysa of Europe without any civilised norms of behaviour and no scruples. Today, the situation is pretty much the same. You watch respectable TV talk shows like Riki and Ophra Winfrey, the kind of stuff they discuss and blabber out is sick. And mind you these are RESPECTABLE programmes. What they have in the notorious ones is real bad. This type of behaviour pattern is seen in almost all walks of American life.

    This is what a concerned Jat Bhai (perhaps) , who has stayed in US for quite long, had written

    Raising Our Kids in USA


    By: Devendra Singh (devendra60@hotmail.com)
    January 29, 2006


    We all face many challenges in raising our kids in this country where a high level of competition is stressed in order to achieve “external” results. Life in the United States is marked by atomization, where each individual is hurrying and spinning in his or her own direction. We can see the individualistic forces in this so-called modern society. We have a car or two or three; we have houses with separate rooms for each person; we have offices where we work at a computer terminal; we have children raised in front of television… Then we worry that the influence of outside environment and peer pressure is Americanizing our kids!

    It is not that we do nothing to counter these influences. We do send our kids to various religious camps to learn Hindu culture; we enroll our kids in Bal Vihars; we try to teach our kids Hindi, Gujarati, Punjabi, etc. by putting our children in ½ hour classes one or two times a month (although, home learning of language, unfortunately, is not stressed); we also encourage our kids to learn Bhartiya songs and dances, etc. I also hear from parents that after the age of 15 when kids enter High school, the learning of Hindu culture for most of the teenagers is not a priority. The teenagers would rather go to sleep over parties, attend and play baseball and soccer games, and engage in other “youth-related” activities rather than spending some time with learning Hindu culture which in their opinion is “dry and boring.”

    Notwithstanding all our efforts, it seems that we are failing in balancing the eastern and the western values in our children. I think the biggest investment that we can make for the “future” of our children is to visit Bharat with them at least once in two years starting when our children are very young. We might need more persuasion and tactics (read ‘compromise’) when our children have grown older and want to make decisions for themselves just like their American friends. Nevertheless, we must frequently visit Bharat with our kids. This, I hope, will counter many of the negative values that our children pick up in this country. To make our children imbibe Hindu values in this country is like growing mango trees in Minnesota. We can grow the trees in green houses here - but the taste, flavor, aroma, and appearance of mangoes may not be to our liking!

    We aspire for our kids to have the best of both the eastern and the western cultures. For that to happen we need to develop support groups and authentic youth groups where children do not feel isolated. Hindu temples and Bhartiya associations have a greater responsibility in this regard for taking necessary steps. Our kids are saturated with the western culture here. Therefore, we also need to saturate them with our culture by regularly taking family trips to Bharat where the practice of our cherished values is still carried out.

    - In the ordinary course of nature thousands upon thousands are born every day, but he alone is truly born whose birth leads to the elevation of his race.

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