Panipat, July 16
Turning down the divorce proposal put up by the Barah Khap panchayat to end the marriage of Ravinder Gehlout and Shilpa, a khap panchayat held at girl’s native village Siwah today stated that they would not let anybody destroy the girl’s life.
A delegation of the Barah Khap today arrived at Siwah to get the consent of Shilpa’s parents for a mutual divorce. However, after prolonged discussions, the proposal was turned down by the girl’s side.
Today’s khap was organised at the house of Labh Singh Kadyan. Arguing over the issue raised by the khap from Ravinder’s village, locals stated that the boy’s family knew that the girl belonged to the Kadyan gotra and they should have first sought permission from their village before marrying their son with Shilpa.
They stated that the girl was not at fault therefore why should the girl become a victim. They maintained that once divorced, it would become very difficult for the girl to spend the rest of her life unmarried or get remarried.
They said either the boy’s family should convince their village to accept the Kadyan girl as their daughter-in-law or they should leave the village. However, there was no point of giving divorce to the girl after months of marriage, maintained the girl’s side.
Meanwhile, a member of the delegation from Ravinder’s village stated that the boy’s family had kept them in the dark and told them that they had managed to persuade the girl’s family for a mutual divorce, following which they had come here.
It was later decided that a final decision in this regard would be taken at the next khap panchayat, which would be held at Beri village in Rohtak district.
According to a report from Jhajjar, the Kadyan Barha khap panchayat delivered yet another verdict ordering the boy’s family to leave the village by Sunday.
The khap from the boy’s village had been maintaining that the marriage of Ravinder and Shilpa was against social norms. It had even issued a notice to the boy’s family to dispose of their property in the village and leave within 72 hours if the marriage was not dissolved.
Ravinder’s father Rohtash, son of Risal Singh, along with other members of the family had reportedly sought police protection and legal action against 18 residents of their village and some members of the khap panchayat committee following the khap verdict.
http://www.tribuneindia.com/2009/20090717/haryana.htm#1
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Guys,
It seems that in recent times Gotra row over marriage doesnt seem to stop and everytime it arises question needed to be answered in a retrospective way of customs without going berserk over the existing system.It is very hard to avoid these incidents just by saying them ancient mindless tradition of marriage.However, how do all of you feel/think about this system,be honest?
I would want historians and pro-khap supporters to come up and have their say in a constructive way. It would be good if someone come up better guidelines about these not-so-good rows every now and then. Simply criticising would not do any favour to anyone.
Few questions:- 1. Is it the fault of a common [jat] man to be unaware of the ''bhaichara'' among Gotras? How it could be streamlined from the Khap leadership.
2. If such case arises, is there any supreme body to handle these matters in clear and concise manner? If not, then how n when it would be formed?
3.Functionality of Khap system, Why, often is significant to Marriage Gotra row instead of other social upliftment issues? What could be done and most importantly, How?