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Thread: Shadi-byaah main dahej aur dikhava kyon?

  1. #1

    Shadi-byaah main dahej aur dikhava kyon?

    Hamare samaaj main shadiyon main dahej lene aur dene ka rivaaj hai iske vajah se bahut si ladkiyon ki shadi main dahej ke abhaav main dikkat aati hai aur kai baar bemel shadi bhi ho jati hai. shadiyon main dhoom dhaam ke naam par bhi kafi fijulkharach hota hai.

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    jitender68 (October 10th, 2011)

  3. #2
    Quote Originally Posted by PARVYUG View Post
    Hamare samaaj main shadiyon main dahej lene aur dene ka rivaaj hai iske vajah se bahut si ladkiyon ki shadi main dahej ke abhaav main dikkat aati hai aur kai baar bemel shadi bhi ho jati hai. shadiyon main dhoom dhaam ke naam par bhi kafi fijulkharach hota hai.
    माहरे गाम के छोरयाँ के तो बियाह-ए ना होंदे | छोरियां ताहि दहेज़ देवन ने भी तैयार बेठे सें |
    :rockwhen you found a key to success,some ideot change the lock,*******BREAK THE DOOR.
    हक़ मांगने से नहीं मिलता , छिना जाता हे |
    अहिंसा कमजोरों का हथियार हे |
    पगड़ी संभाल जट्टा |
    मौत नु आंगालियाँ पे नचांदे , ते आपां जाट कुहांदे |

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    neetu21 (April 1st, 2011), vinaysirohi (April 2nd, 2011)

  5. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by ravinderjeet View Post
    माहरे गाम के छोरयाँ के तो बियाह-ए ना होंदे | छोरियां ताहि दहेज़ देवन ने भी तैयार बेठे सें |


    ke baat??:rolleyes:
    A350Xwb - Shaping Efficiency!

  6. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by malikdeepak1 View Post
    ke baat??:rolleyes:
    बात के निरे छोरे सें | कोए सगाई आला आज्या तो इसा हाल होज्या गा जानू तो परधानमंत्री आग्या | म्हारे गाम के छड्याँ पे एक तो डोकुमेंट्री बन ली एर दो तीन बे स्पेसल इस्सू आ लिए इंडिया टुडे के | एक पूरी छडा राज्मेंट बन सके स ,इतने हंडे सें सगाई आल्याँ की बाट में |
    :rockwhen you found a key to success,some ideot change the lock,*******BREAK THE DOOR.
    हक़ मांगने से नहीं मिलता , छिना जाता हे |
    अहिंसा कमजोरों का हथियार हे |
    पगड़ी संभाल जट्टा |
    मौत नु आंगालियाँ पे नचांदे , ते आपां जाट कुहांदे |

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    VirJ (April 2nd, 2011), vishalsunsunwal (September 28th, 2011)

  8. #5
    Raam Raam Bhaio,
    Aaj me kisi discussion me pahli baar kuch likhne ja raha hu, kisi ko baat galat ya sahi lage to apne vichaar jaroor rakkhe.

    Jahaan tak shaadi me dahej ki baat hai to din pe din ye pratha badhti hi ja rahi hai.
    Dehej maangne k kitne saare reason sochte haai log;
    1.Maine to apne ladke ko padhaya hai,paise lagaaye hain iski padhai me to uski poorti dehej se kr lu.
    2.Kisi k rishtedaaro k byah me car aayi to sochega ki mujhe bhi car mil jaaye.
    3.Mere ladke k hisse me to itni saari jameen hai,kisi k paas ni itni;jab 10 beeghe vale k 1 lakh ka dahej aaya to 50 beeghe vala 5 maangega.
    4.Maine apni ladki ki shaadi me itna kuch diya use ladke k byah me vasoolna hai.
    Or bhi bahut saare kaaran hai dehej maangne k jaise log aisa hi dahej maang lete hain.

    Sab mata-pita se anurodh hai ki aisa mat socho.Baalko ko kaabil banao;padhao,likhao hisaab jaanege to kheti me bhi kaam sahi hi karenge.Ladki bhi padhegi to agle ghar jaake ghar bhi sahi tarah sambhaalegi or jarurat padi to ghar ki kamaai me barabar ki hissedaar bhi ban sakegi.
    Apne padosiyo ko dekh k ya rishtedaaro ko dekh k dahej na maango or na do.
    itna paisa jo byah me kharach krte ho use apne baccho ko kaabil banane me lagao.
    Aise laalchiyo k ghar me ladki mat do jo paise k gulaam ho,rahne to unke baalko ko randve.

    -Abhinav Jat

  9. The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to AbhinavMahle For This Useful Post:

    DrRajpalSingh (July 11th, 2012), JSRana (September 28th, 2011), PARVYUG (April 2nd, 2011), reenu (September 28th, 2011), Sure (July 11th, 2012), vinaysirohi (April 2nd, 2011), yogeshdahiya007 (November 18th, 2011)

  10. #6
    Bahut achchha likha aapne abhinav. agar sabhi nahin to kam se kam JATLAND MEMBER to ye thread padhke jaroor kuchh gambhir faisala lenge. main avivahit haun aur main jab shadi karunga to bina dahej ke bilkul sadagi se.

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    ygulia (June 16th, 2012)

  12. #7
    Dhanyavaad bhai Parvyug.

  13. #8
    Bhai, this problem is there but we all individually can stop . Last 50 years I have noticed that many times lot of efforts were puton by the elders of the community against this desease but no real effect. I feel every individual has to take action. I got married when I was an officer, but still I got married with one rupee, even my family members were against my decision. Even I arrenged the marriage of my son without any thing not even one rupee. Thus, we all have to act.

  14. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Fateh For This Useful Post:

    AbhinavMahle (August 15th, 2011), JSRana (September 28th, 2011), PARVYUG (April 3rd, 2011), ravinderjeet (April 3rd, 2011), reenu (September 28th, 2011)

  15. #9
    It is a major problem with every society undoubtedly,but the thing is people say it bad only when others are doing this act.
    When it comes to them they are also a part to this Dowry thing.
    My suggestion is one should not look for others but put an example in fromnt of all.

    Cheers!
    -- Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.
    -- When you talk, you are only repeating what you already know. But if you listen, you may learn something new.

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    DrRajpalSingh (July 11th, 2012), reenu (September 28th, 2011)

  17. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by PARVYUG View Post
    Hamare samaaj main shadiyon main dahej lene aur dene ka rivaaj hai iske vajah se bahut si ladkiyon ki shadi main dahej ke abhaav main dikkat aati hai aur kai baar bemel shadi bhi ho jati hai. shadiyon main dhoom dhaam ke naam par bhi kafi fijulkharach hota hai.
    This is a part and parcel of majority of Arranged Marriages. - samaj mein izzat bananae kae leeyae - Deekhawa. They cannot think of any better way to use their resources.
    Attention seekers and attention getters are two different class of people.

  18. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by urmiladuhan View Post
    This is a part and parcel of majority of Arranged Marriages. - samaj mein izzat bananae kae leeyae - Deekhawa. They cannot think of any better way to use their resources.
    I am also of the view that the "samman" (gifts) ceremony (exchange of gifts during a marriage ceremony) is a beautiful tradition, if done with good intentions. It is a way to show regard to the other party's family members. However, when people start demanding gifts, that's when it gets ugly.
    Attention seekers and attention getters are two different class of people.

  19. #12
    Quote Originally Posted by urmiladuhan View Post
    I am also of the view that the "samman" (gifts) ceremony (exchange of gifts during a marriage ceremony) is a beautiful tradition, if done with good intentions. It is a way to show regard to the other party's family members. However, when people start demanding gifts, that's when it gets ugly.
    Once you start such tradition, intention cannot be known but certainly competition starts, some can efford but many have to do with lot of difficulty. Thus I feel have simple, well organised and happy function and if somebody wants to give something, he can give earlier/lateron, so that poor is not dragged into the tradition.

  20. #13
    In context of this I would say that we must start social reforms...and that should be owned by all. We must appriciate the families those initiates "NO Dowry-Bina Dahej" shadi socially....Yongsters should come forward and bycot Dahej system.

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    DrRajpalSingh (July 11th, 2012), karambir11 (October 13th, 2011)

  22. #14
    bhai bat to thik hai koi akela to thik nahi kar sakta par koshish kar sakta hoon jaroor karunga aur sabhi bhai kam se kam ek koshish to jarror karain.

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    DrRajpalSingh (July 11th, 2012), karambir11 (November 20th, 2011)

  24. #15
    these days lavish lifestyle,flaunting of materialistic possessions,projecting one self superior by virtue of money has become status symbol.
    our life from birth to death has become slave to comparative mentality,no one is happy being one self.there are some stupid rules which if you don`t follow you will be tagged as stone aged human being.to overcome these comparisons we constantly indulge in being part of rat race and if we are some where behind we seek some stimulus from somewhere, i think dowry is one of those stimulus which we have made a norm and a rasm .

    By grabbing lakhs in marriage we update our status but the next guy ,aunty,uncle dulha dulhan again compares so they seek dowry which will be more than somebody in neighbor has got.

    i am unmarried and i have told my family that when i will get married.. i won`t through a party and spend 2-3 lakhs rupees on DJ,liquor....and other predefined norms of todays marriage ceremony.i will either marry in ARYA SAMAJ mandir or SHANTI KUNJ in HARIDWAR.
    i will give small and very simple party of simple vegetarian food.this way getting many expenses cut i will save lots of money and never have to beg in front of in-laws parents and torture them.
    Last edited by shekharjat; June 16th, 2012 at 06:39 PM.

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    anilrana (July 11th, 2012), DrRajpalSingh (July 11th, 2012), Sure (July 11th, 2012)

  26. #16
    AAj samaj mein teji ke saath badhate ja rahi dhikawe kee hod ko rokane ke liya kargar kadam uthane ki zaroorat hai! samajik kshetra mein karyaratsangthan is disha mein mei kargar kadam utha sakate hein taki is garjaroori competition ko roka ja sake aur samaj theek raste pe chale!

    Iske liye jaroori hai sahi disha nirdesh zari karne ke saath saath logon ko is prakar ki gatividhiyon se bachne ke liya manhik rup se tayar kiya jave!

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    anilrana (July 11th, 2012)

  28. #17
    Quote Originally Posted by ravinderjeet View Post
    माहरे गाम के छोरयाँ के तो बियाह-ए ना होंदे | छोरियां ताहि दहेज़ देवन ने भी तैयार बेठे सें |

    Very pathetic Indeed!

    If the position is so, real danger looms large on the existence of a village.

  29. #18
    Quote Originally Posted by DrRajpalSingh View Post
    Very pathetic Indeed!

    If the position is so, real danger looms large on the existence of a village.
    किम्मे डेंजर कोणी , २०,००० की जसंख्या स गाम में | अर इतने-ए बाहर बस रे सें | माणसां की कमी आवेगी ते उलटे आ ज्यांगे |
    :rockwhen you found a key to success,some ideot change the lock,*******BREAK THE DOOR.
    हक़ मांगने से नहीं मिलता , छिना जाता हे |
    अहिंसा कमजोरों का हथियार हे |
    पगड़ी संभाल जट्टा |
    मौत नु आंगालियाँ पे नचांदे , ते आपां जाट कुहांदे |

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    anilsangwan (July 11th, 2012)

  31. #19
    Quote Originally Posted by ravinderjeet View Post
    किम्मे डेंजर कोणी , २०,००० की जसंख्या स गाम में | अर इतने-ए बाहर बस रे सें | माणसां की कमी आवेगी ते उलटे आ ज्यांगे |
    Very Good.......

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