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    Wink Rahul Gandhi Joke Book

    NEW DELHI: The Congress released amid much fanfare The Official Rahul Gandhi Joke Book at an invitation-only press conference in New Delhi on Monday.

    The special-edition volume, mainly a compilation of jokes that trended non-stop for 48 hours on Twitter in India after Rahul Gandhi's recent Punjab visit, contained most of the jokes that were hashtagged #YoRahulSoDumb, besides other Rahul Gandhi jokes that have been doing the rounds of cyberspace for the past few years.

    The volume was released by Mr Rahul Gandhi himself, who looked cheerful and optimistic and wore a fool's cap and a clown's nose to mark the occasion. "This," said Mr Gandhi, "is a very proud moment for me when I, in my personal capacity, have been able to generate miles of smiles across Twitterati in India." He paused for a moment and fished out a calculator to figure out how many miles of smiles he had created. "It's ten thousand miles out of a total seven thousand," he said in a victorious tone, "that's ten out of every seven!" The crowd, which also included many Rahul Gandhi fans who managed to get an invite, went berserk with joy and applauded loudly. "Kaangress ke haath, hasmukh voters ke saath," said Mr Gandhi, and everybody yelled in approval.

    Quoting from the volume, Mr Gandhi said, "Here's one joke I'm particularly fond of - Why did Rahul touch the livewire? Because he wanted to be more powerful. And here's another: Why did Rahul try to buy the Deccan Chargers? Because he thought they could charge his cellphone."

    It was Mr Gandhi's intelligent and well-informed remarks on the drug problem among the youth of Punjab that sparked the spate of jokes on Twitter and made #YoRahulSoDumb trend non-stop for almost two days, a feat rarely achieved even by the most liberal standards in the Indian cyberspace. "This is also an opportunity for me to thank my millions of smitten fans who have taken the pains to write, compile and circulate these jokes with lots of affection and respect for me," Mr Gandhi added.

    Dr Manmohan Singh, who also shared the stage with the Gandhi scion, added that the trend generates happiness and positivity all round despite Arvind Kejriwal continuing with his unabated crusade against corruption armed with documentary proof. Mr Singh welcomed the Official Rahul Gandhi Joke Book as a progressive move to counter the negativity and sullied image of the nation that was being projected by Kejriwal and his IAC. "Silence is golden, and dumb people make no enemies, just like dead men tell no tales," he said at the press conference in the auditorium that was packed to the brim.

    A Congress spokesperson said electronic versions in .pdf, .mobi and .epub formats will be shortly made available on the AICC website for those using e-readers and tablets. An SMS joke book along the same lines is also in the works, he added. Special previews have been made available as memes on Twitter and also on Google Books, and subsidised versions for students and weaker sections of society would also be printed in accordance with the party's policies, he said.

    The press conference was attended among others by senior Congress leaders Digvijaya Singh, Salman Khurshid, Ambika Soni, Renuka Chowdhury, Kapil Sibal, P. Chidambaram and key members of the Gandhi family including Robert Vadra and Priyanka Gandhi Vadra, both of whom were happy that that the focus of family assets moved from landed property to intellectual property. They both called the volume a valuable family asset that they were proud to share with the nation.

    Talking to journalists on television, former ally Mamata Banerjee expressed her disapproval of all things funny, which included jokes and cartoons. Opposition leaders Sushma Swaraj and LK Advani called the joke book a cruel joke on the state of the country's democratic values. Mayawati, while mulling on her decision to support the Congress, said courtesy lines should also acknowledge the contribution of all allies who lie, as also those who don't.

    The press conference ended on a happy note with Republic Bananas and People Mangoes (both genetically modified brands, soft and seedless) served as refreshments.

    महाबला महावीर्या महासत्यपराक्रमा: |
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